Forum Thread

Guys, I have a few stories in my libary! What do you all think? They aren't my stories, I just have heard them before.

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Oh, I've heard those stories! Yes, I like those.

*quietly looks up more fables to toss into the library*

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Okay so, since I'm kind of having an idea right now while listening to some amazing music for a while, I'm just going to try to write my idea out into a short story.

I'd suggest you to listen to the "Inspiration" soundtrack while reading~

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Starbound
Inspiration: [x] | Theme: Pokémon Mystery Dungeon x Friendship x Adventure
Characters: Sachi [female Skitty] | Hisashi [male Cyndaquil]

Sachis paws were hurting. She was out of breath when she finally left the Steam Cave with her partner and best friend, Hisashi. The Pokémon in this area were incredibly strong and left the two guild apprentices badly hurt.
»I think we should take a break«, Hisashi said while gasping for breath. Sachi nodded and they took out some berries to regain their strength.

As sunset crept closer, a strange feeling got Sachi. »I feel like something's here«, she said. Hisashi looked at her, a little confused. »You mean Uxie?«
Sachi shook her head. »No. Something bigger. And far more dangerous...«
Only a few heartbeats later, the earth started to shake and a loud growl was heard. A shadow loomed above the two explorers and they jumped up. A tall figure was standing right in front of them, growling in anger. Its body was red. Tall, sharp claws on its dangerously big hands. Hisashi stared at it in fear before he was able to regain his voice. The Pokémon that stood there right in front of them... It was... »Groudon!«

Groudon growled once again before it lifted its giant arm to smash it down on Hisashi. He seemed scared, but he was able to dodge the attack. Groudon quickly distanced itself. Sachi quickly reached into the explorer bag and grabbed a Sleep Seed which she threw at Groudon. Groudon, despite being a mighty Pokémon, didn't seem to be as clever as everyone said. It grabbed the Seed and ate it. As it fell asleep, the two partners took their chance and kept attacking Groudon.
The Seed lost it's power very soon, but Sachi was able to land a powerful hit on Groudon which defeated it directly after it woke up.
Groudon collapsed with a final growl. Sachi and Hisashi stared at it, still prepared to battle it if it would stand up again. But it didn't. A bright light blinded the two and as it faded, Groudon was gone.

»What did just happen?«, Hisashi asked in confusion, and Sachi shook her head again. »I have no idea«.
»We should probably go on now...« her partner suggested and they left the place as fast as they could.

Only a few steps further they were able to see a soft, green-ish glow and hear the quiet murmuring of water. Sachi was looking over the lake. At the first sight, she couldn't tell if she was looking at the lake or the night sky. The stars and the moon were reflected perfectly by the surface and seemed to dance over the slightly moving water. The green glow in the middle of the lake added a more mysterious, yet charming atmosphere. Hisashi stood next to her and smiled in amazement. »It's a breathtaking sight«, he whispered and Sachi couldn't agree more. She could stand here and look at this lake forever...

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Yeah, I obviously got lazy at the battle with Groudon, but it's literally how I beat it in the actual game also the first time I tried to describe a Pokémon battle so please don't be too hard on me here. :'0 How do you like the story? Is there anything I could do better? Any grammar or spelling mistakes? ;u;

Hi guys! So I just read Nishinoya's story and I was impressed. One thing though, nightsky should be night sky. Nightsky isn't one word, it's two. Other than that, I saw nothing else to be fixed.

@jamesmadisonscreams:
Thank you very much! ;u; I'm going to fix it in a moment! //also sticks a sticky note on own forehead

@Nishinoya
I only noticed like two mistakes. ^^

One, the 'it's' in "The Seed lost it's power..." should be its, since it's possessive, not 'it is.'

Also, "»What did just happen?«" could stand to get rid of the 'did.'

That's all! Otherwise, nice story! PMD is my favorite game out of all the Pokemon games, and for good reason. With an amazing soundtrack and an even better story, it is my favorite game...

Don't ever forget.

@Dragon
its and it's is still one of my main mistake sources. I'll work on that one, thank you!

On the second one, I actually think "»What did just happen?«" is alright. Unless you mean I should use "»What just happened?«" - then you'd be right, I think. In my opinion, "What did just happen?" is fine and to me it sounds a little better. Still thank you for the advice, I will definitely take it to notice!

Pokémon Mystery Dungeon is indeed a great spin-off game and I actually think no Pokémon game ever had so much inpact on me as the PMD series. I re-played them so often, thinking "I saw this ending so often, this time I won't cry!" and end up crying again. :')

@Nishi

"What just happened?" Is probably what Drago meant, yeah. But other than that, that was pretty good!

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@Nishi That was really good! One thing, I think "What just happened?" would've fit better then "What did just happen?".

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I've been working on that fanfic I mentioned, and I'm gonna put some of what I have in a spoiler-thing, and I want to know if there's stuff I could do better, or if there's grammar mistakes because I sometimes I overlook them, or anything like that? (It's in first-person and... I don't write in first person enough, so there's one thing I'm really worried about doing wrong).

Also, quick note, anything written 'like this', is something written down, not being said or thought, and anything written likethis, is something be said at a faster pace then normal for the character talking.

@Nishi
Oops! Yeah, Lucky was right lol c: Sorry for the confusion!

@Prim
I love it! Other than those mistakes the others mentioned, it looks great!

@FF2
It seems good, although it could do with a bit of editing. It has fantastic potential, however.

@FF2
Oops! I was so intent on replying to Lucky that I forgot to read over your post!

Sounds great so far! Only thing I noticed was that the 'it's' in "...being the room outside of it’s ceiling..." should be its. :) Otherwise, looks good!

@FF2
Very nice! It could use some polishing but what story doesn't? : )

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Ooooh, I had a character idea for Rogen (who was created on a whim)

I want her to be almost human-like, but she has completely icy blue eyes, pupil, iris, even the whites. She's very mysterious, hates people mentioning her last and such, and tends to be an introvert. She has canine-like teeth, and boyishly cut light red-blonde curls. She can manipulate ice, and usually makes it into a thin rod that's sharp on both ends, like a staff. But the she's actually the protector of a necklace that has a bunch of danelion fluff and a small gold charm in a little glass orb on a silver chain. It contains the hopes and dreams and wishes of all children, and she can use it to make a wish come true. Yet she has to protect it to keep it out of the wrong hands.

What do you think?

Thanks for having me, guys! <3

@RecklessLyrics: Sounds interesting! o: I'm excited to hear about whatever goes wrong with all of it pfft (tbh designing villains for plots is one of my most favorite things to do!). The villain could be someone who hates children or wants to brainwash children for WORLD DOMINATION pfft

And though I haven't written anything for my personal satisfaction recently, I did join a contest a month ago, so this is my most recent work! Let me know what you guys think of it. c: (I don't think copy-pasting it all here would fit within the character limit pfft)

love, love, love.

It's a sappy story about self-realization and blah blah cheesy stuff

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Hey! I have a small blurb I would like some feedback/criticism on if that is alright.

@Atavan: Found some minor errors with lack of comma ("He is your brother as well Fate, along with War.") and grammar (A young girl, dressed in a white dress, stands on top of the hill...).
Interesting story! I'd like to know what happened to Fate and why she's angry. Also, I expected Death to be more grim than Fate based on name alone, but I realized he was different from Devil/Hell, and I guess your Death here has a different character design!
Who are the characters of your story? o: Kinda hard to keep track of all the sudden names in one blurb, but if it's a part of a whole then it's understandable. x)

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So, uh. I dont know what to do, but Im in a writy mood rn.

Would you prefer if I continued my crossovery demigod story thing or if I did a story based around SU Gem Homeworld?

@Skar Thank you for the feedback. This is just a small part of a bigger story that is circling around in my head. So far the characters are Death, Life, Heaven, Hell, War, Pestilence, Famine, Fate, and Heaven. Though more are expected to join.Death in this is more of a father figure then Grim Reaper base.You just have to wait to find out what happened to Fate.

@meme Uh..I would say demigod but that is my personal opinion since I know nothing about Steven Universe.So you could say I am a bit bias.