Forum Thread
Danganronpa Roleplay [PRIVATE]
Forum-Index → Roleplay → Private RP → Danganronpa Roleplay [PRIVATE]now playing: idlewild - travis
Once upon a row of houses
Tight skirts and baggy trousers
Grey men in cheap disguises
High hopes and higher rises
Here lived a girl who was on a mission
Here lived a boy who was under suspicion
Tried hard to stay beside her
He sat, knees touching his forehead and his head hung low. The cool spray of the shower soaked his hoodie and ran down his face, adding to the several tears as he sobbed quietly.
How?
You know how
Sleep too long and the sand runs out
So close to midnight
Time to fly
Do or die
Stung in the headlights
It was like history was repeating himself. Every time he got close to someone they always went away. Never came back. Never heard a final goodbye.
Here we lie
High and dry
The world will never see you 'till you open your eyes
Say goodnight
Kill the light
The world will never hear you tonight
Idlewild
He closed his eyes, wishing it would just go all away and it would stop here.
This was all just one....huge....terrible dream...right?
RIGHT?
RI-
For two years he tried to reach her
Worshiped the ground beneath her
She, she was always running
He, he saw the end was coming
He rubbed his eyes angrily, water dripping off the ends of his hair.
But now the story takes a turn
She wakes up and her sheets are burning
Head down against the fire
Now, now, now the table turns
The tears had dried up as quickly as they fell.
He just felt so
so
so
angry.
At everyone and everything.
"..I thought that we were good together
I thought that we could weather the weather
Whether or not that wise is the word for us
That high hopes are only there because, because
Because I thought the only thing between us
Was something shallow, not a river so deep, we see it's
Dredge up the wreckage our parents left us
Lay it on the banks to rot and fester...
...Now a skeleton hanging like a death star
And grim and green in dark Manchester
I don't want to hear it now..."
His head lolled back and forth, eyes closed, fingers shaking.
"...miss you already..."
"...Here we lie
High and dry
The world will never see you 'till you open your eyes
Say goodnight, kill the light
The world will never hear you tonight...
not tonight and not ever
i'm so sorry
i'm so
so
sorry.
i could've done so much more
i could've prevented everything
i'm
so
s-
....."
The water kept on falling, and Idris' hand fell away from his head.
Idlewild
Idlewild
Kill the light
Idlewild
Kill the light
Idlewild
why's the world spinning?
Kubo Atsushi
"Feeling the greatest," he echoed dully.
Who was the greatest...?
Kaoru...
His eyes closed. Tears trickled out of the corners. "Kaoru's dead," he said softly. "We killed her. We killed our angel."
Another face flashed before his eyes. He wasn't sure who she was, but the smile was all too familiar. Ha! So much for the Ultimate Detective; huh? Say, do you think-
He blinked, and the girl was gone, the room quiet once more. It was just him and the other person now.
Lucian Arbred's POV
"Y-You are? That's..."
Lucian paused. He wasn't so sure he believed that. Something about the dullness of Kubo's voice, and just something seemed to be... Telling him it wasn't answering his question.
"Kaoru's dead. We killed her. We killed our angel."
Lucian's eyes widened. A sad look came upon his face.
...she... She was dead.
We killed her.
"...it... Wasn't your fault, Kubo. It was mine..."
...
"I... I miss her too..."
Kaoru. She was dead. Dead and gone. A sickening feeling overtook him.
He couldn't help it. He threw his arms around him, tears forming in his eyes.
...he just wanted to cry with him.
"...Kubo... What's wrong?" he asked, choking the words out.
I know you're not fine...
Yes... That... That had to be it.
...
That's why he'd said that, right?
...
He was losing it.
Lucian wanted to beat himself for even thinking about that.
...
It didn't matter if Kubo hated him. If Kubo hated him, well, Lucian knew he deserved it...
He just wanted him to be okay...
"...I- I'll help you, okay? We can figure this out together..."
Third Person POV
"Help me," Kubo echoed dully. His pupils were unfocused- they didn't even seem to be seeing Lucian at all and his body was shaking.
Oh, looked like he was falling over-
Lucian Arbred's POV
"No! Kubo! Be careful, don't fall!"
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.
"I-- I'll go get help, okay? Just stay here, take it easy..."
Tears stirred in his eyes.
He didn't care what Kubo had said to him anymore.
The question was... Who could he ask for help?
Was... Was Kubo sick? Badly injured somehow? Was he fainting from shock?
"I-It's okay, you'll be okay..."
Please be okay.
...
I don't want to lose you.
...
I love you.
Lucian Arbred's POV
Lucian's heart pounded out of his chest. Ba-bump... Ba-bump...
He could almost feel reality slipping away as the color flooded into his cheeks.
The first thought he had had... Was relief. Kubo wasn't falling unconscious. He...
He just seemed a little out of it.
What do I even say to that?...
...
He thinks I'm an angel...
"I-- In a way, yes..."
He seemed like he'd completely forgotten who he was. What.. what was happening to Kubo?
Let him believe Lucian was an angel if that was what he needed to hear right now.
...
There was... No harm in that, right?
How conceited, Luke.
He liked it, he admitted. He liked hearing Kubo call him an angel. Sincerely believe he was an angel...
"...I'm here to help you."
Lucian swallowed. There was... No way he could tell him he loved him.
Was there?
"...do you... Remember me? It's... Me, Lucian."
...
Was there any point in dreaming?
...
No, he had to help Kubo. And everyone else.
But... I told Mei...
...
Dorky's POV
He pulled out a TV remote and hit the play button.
Darcy Harper's POV
"Just why?" he whispered to himself. "I don't understand..."
Why did Will have to walk out on me again?
And this time, he wasn't with Erica. He was a gh-
No.
Will was not Mei, but...
"...you never listen, do you?"
...
"It's just not like you. Not to Setsuna, not to me..."
He let out a faint hiccuping sob.
"Well, why would anyone listen to me anyway?"
...
"It's like I don't even exist. I'm surprised Akora even noticed when I smashed that mirror. Maybe God should have shattered me like I did that glass..."
He chuckled quietly to himself.
"I regret everything... I regret everything so much."
It wasn't like Mei had owed him anything.
They'd barely known one another, and yet...
...
I just moved aside and let
...
"It's my fault, really, isn't it? I judged you too quickly, didn't I?"
...
"Mei..."
There was only one person who could understand how he was feeling right now.
Only one person, and he wouldn't dare talk to him.
And he couldn't imagine how awkward that'd be.
Oh, hey, Idris, you know your dead girlfriend? Who I did-didn't-did-didn't kinda did kinda didn't have a crush on?
Well, she's dead, and I have no idea how to f**king deal with it, and you probably feel the same way but worse. Please help.
And Setsuna, god...
...
How could Darcy be so selfish right now? When so many other people were suffering?
"And do I really have the right to grieve for you? Do I even... Have the right to consider you to... Be a possibly bad person?"
...
"You were right about me, Mei. You were so right. I belong in Hell."
...
"I'm not a good person. I never will be. And I'm just going to die here and be forgotten and nobody will even heave a single sigh, or wish for me..."
...
The thought was just unbearable.
"I- I just... Wanted him to love me. Was that so bad? And I... I got jealous, because... Everyone always had what I didn't."
A smiling Lucian flickered in Darcy's vision. He let out a shuddering sob.
"Look at me, telling myself this rather than seeing our own goddamn therapist..."
...
I empathized with him, he realized. When Kubo was treating him like that...
...
I know what it's like to be rejected. Laughed at. Hated and mistreated by those I love.
...
And I want you to be happy, but I--
Shi and Miyako. Smiling together.
"F**king good for you," he choked out.
They... They hadn't done anything wrong, but...
But...
He gritted his teeth. He hated it. Was...
Was it so selfish that...
That he wanted that kind of happy ending with someone too?
But Darcy wasn't even sure he could... Even think about Sawyer. Sawyer and their empty, empty confused eyes and... And...
How they looked at him without even knowing who he was anymore.
Mom, always looking so angry and disappointed...
Darcy, in tears, always swearing to himself he'd try harder.
He'd make her proud. She'd love him one day.
But it was always Erica.
...
Erica, who hadn't really done anything wrong.
And yet...
Darcy couldn't help but to feel so, so bitter.
Because she had everything.
Because she was loved by everyone.
Because she, undoubtedly, would be remembered.
And Darcy would just die here.
Alone.
Unloved.
Forgotten.
As though he'd never even existed.
But Idris...
Had lost Mei. To death. It reminded Darcy of how his dad had left...
...well...
At least Idris had known Mei loved him.
Sometimes, Darcy blamed himself for his father leaving.
And...
...
Maybe that was...
...
Maybe that was...
"You. Sometimes I can't even bear to look at you."
"M-Mom?! What are you-"
"You look just like him, Darcy. You have his face. You have his hair. You have his eyes." Her eyes narrowed into slits.
"I bet you'll wind up just like that."
...
"Wh-wh... I-"
Darcy couldn't even formulate a response to that. He wanted to scream indignantly that, no, he'd never do that. He'd never be like that!
He'd never leave... Someone behind. Without saying another word to them.
Leave them without answers.
Wondering what they did wrong.
Wondering if he had hated them.
Wondering if he had intended to hurt them.
But as drunk as Mom was...
He couldn't help but wonder... If she was right.
I hate that damn mirror.
...
I hate what I see in it.
...
I don't want to wind up like him.
Is that why I was never good enough for you, Mom?
...
Erica was her perfect daughter. Her spitting image.
Kind, charismatic, so strong-willed and hardworking, so, so, so smart.
She was lovable. She was perfect. She would never be forgotten.
Darcy was unlovable. He was imperfect.
...
He would be forgotten.
By some strange coincidence, he found himself at the door Idris was behind. He knocked on it, trying to keep in his tears. Trying his best to calm down.
"I-Idris?"
...
"It's... Me. Darcy. Can we talk?"
...
You're the only one who can understand...
...
I can't tell anyone else.
"I-Idris?..."
He still didn't answer.
Something might be wrong.
Maybe he's not here...
...
Hesitantly, Darcy fiddled with the door. It... was unlocked.
He didn't want to intrude on his privacy. But what if something was really wrong?
He opened the door, and headed in.
"Hey, Idris, sorry to walk in unannounced like this, I wanted to... ask first but you didn't answer and--"
His eyes widened.
Idris. Collapsed on the floor.
"Idris?! Idris!"
He tried gently shaking him awake. He had to stay calm.
"Idris, can you hear me? Idris!"
Idris, can you hear me? Idris!
Idris! Idris!
Idris!
Idris...can you hear me? Idris!
Darcy's voice sounded muffled and distorted.
Idris!
Then there was the cold splashes of water on his face.
Dammit.
The shower was still on?
How-
Oh.
He must've collapsed in the shower.
...how embarrassing.
His eyes opened slowly, black irises glaring at his surroundings.
"...Darcy? Why....huh?"
Darcy Harper's POV
Darcy's voice caught in his throat. For a moment, he wasn't sure what to say.
"Thank God. You're okay. I found you unconscious in here." He heaved a sigh of relief. "I tried knocking, but you didn't answer, and the door was unlocked, so I..."
Awkwardly, Darcy paused to turn off the shower.
"Are you alright?... I... Really wanted to talk to you, and I figured you weren't doing too well, it's just... I..."
A sad look came upon his face. "I'm sorry, it's... Kind of selfish... I thought... You'd be the only one who'd understand." He swallowed. "How I'm... Never mind..."
He inhaled sharply. "I understand if... You want to be left alone. I know you're struggling, too. After... what happened."
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
she's about to slap every single one of these fools
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
...Oh.
So everyone had left the scene. Wonder where they all ran off to.
Akari sighed, then stuffed his hands back in his pockets as he took one last glance over the edge before walking back to his dorm.
...
The walk there was agonizing, to say the least. The silence forced his own thought to fill in the lack of noise, and obviously that wasn't pleasant. He had managed to hold it together long enough to not look like an idiot in front of everyone else, but now...
He was locked away in his room, nobody but himself, all alone. Nobody to see his own personal hell, nobody to fill in the silence, nobody to stop him.
All alone, once again.
Akari sat down on his bed silently, only looking at the ground below as time only seemed to stop completely. After what seemed like forever, a small rustling was heard as he reached deeper into his pockets, his hand gripping the small object that Mei had given back to him before she...
Before she...
...
Click
...Since when did he open it?
Since when did he start seeing his reflection in that metal?
He gripped the object tightly, all he could do was stare. It was basically a glorified and complex swiss army knife that he had made long ago, sure as hell didn't look like it, but that was its function.
Drip...
Drip..
Drip.
Since when did he-
The blade. His hand.
His neck.
...
Why did he stop? Just a little deeper and then...
Oh.
He couldn't move.
Even if he wanted to, he couldn't.
His breathing was heavy, his vision was blurry, the ringing in his ears was deafening, the sounds in his head were-
Thud
Oh.
It fell out of his hand. The sound alone pretty much brought him back to his senses. Akari went to go pick it back up after a sigh, but-
Oh. Right. He... Couldn't move.
So, he tried his other hand. He picked the cursed object up slowly, gripped it tightly, then rolled up the sleeves on his other arm.
God he always hated doing this, it was only a painful reminder of the fate he had subjected himself to, a reminder of all the horrible things that-
Just... Get it over with.
Another small click was heard, and with one swift motion, he was done.
And with that, he shoved the object back into his pockets, rolled down his sleeves, and found himself in silence once again. Sitting on his bed, hunched over and gripping the back of his neck. Thinking about things he so desperately wanted to forget. Brush away to the back of his mind, just like he always did.
Drip...
Drip..
Drip.
...Just like how he always did.
Kubo Atsushi
Lucian... Lucian... LUCIAN!
He jerked upwards, tumbling off the bed. Before Lucian could make a move to help him, he was on his feet, scrambling back, hands flying up to shield his face-
"Don't kill me!" he begged. "Please- don't kill me-"
Lucian Arbred's POV
"I-I WOULD NEVER, KUBO! I LO-"
He froze up for a moment. "I... Care a lot about you. And I'm not mad. Really. I forgive you." There was a certain hurt in his eyes as he looked at him. Lucian felt as though someone had just snapped his heart in half.
He gave Kubo a warm smile. "I'll... Always forgive you. No matter what. Kubo, I... I'm here to help, if- you need me to go... I will."
He hadn't even realized how much he was shaking, or the tears that dripped down his face.
"I just want to help..."
He looks so scared... Kubo, I'm so sorry. This is my fault.
He let out a choking sob.
"K-KUBO, I-- I'm so sorry I pushed you! I didn't mean to, I..."
...
"...you should have pushed me off that ledge. Or I should have jumped. I deserved it."
I don't deserve you. If I made you hate me, if I made you want to kill me, if... If you're terrifed that I'm going to take your life...
"I-- I'd never kill you, Kubo," he choked out hoarsely. "...never ever."
I love you, even if you utterly despise me.
He breathed deeply.
And as your therapist, and your
Kubo Atsushi
Kubo blinked slowly, carefully, and finally lowered his hands. "Lucian..." he whispered. "I think I hit my head. C-Can you check it?"
Lucian Arbred's POV
Lucian slowly, carefully approached Kubo and felt at his head to see if there was any injury. His face reddened, but, NO- he- he had to try not to think-
Wow, his hair is... Awfully greasy.
Lucian almost got distracted for a moment. "I- um- I don't- think you hit your head... But... Maybe we should bring you to Akora? Just to be safe?"
Oh, Heaven help me.
He tried not to think about it. About feeling through Kubo's hair to check if he hit his head anywhere. It...
It wasn't a big deal, right?
I mean, he touches me all the--
...what had been the deal with that?
Kubo, throwing his arms around him. Kubo, returning his embrace. Kubo, hooking Lucian by the arm. Their hands almost touching...
But not quite...
It was... It was all coincidence. Kubo must have not even realized he was doing it.
AND HE COULDN'T THINK ABOUT THAT HE NEEDED TO FOCUS-
"She may be a vet, but... Even she knows more than I do..."
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
He had been sitting there for a while now, hunched over with his arms rested on his knees and his hands loosely clasped together.
Drip...
Drip..
Drip.
He was blinded by the visions that blurred his gaze, deafened by the ringing and faint memories of sounds he could never get out of his head.
Drip
Drip
Drip
He was blinded from the puddle of rubies that began to grow on the ground beneath him, the clothes on his skin. He was deafened from the yells that echoed from the room nearby.
Drip
Drip
DRIP
Everything was getting hazier by the second, the ringing only got louder, it was getting harder and harder to keep himself from collapsing on the spot.
Click
...Wh-
Oh.
Yeah, that certainly did it.
Akari finally looked down at the puddle of red below him, albeit very slowly and without any concern whatsoever. His eyes could stare at only that small sea for what seemed like another eternity before they moved to the splotches and streaks it had left on his clothes.
For a moment, he did nothing. For a moment, he considered watching the sea below him grow so he could drown in it. For a moment, he relished the thought.
For a moment, his hand tightened around the blade in his hands.
An eternity passed. Time didn't even seem to be flowing.
Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
What's wrong, Akari? Hm?
Too much of a coward to do it?
...
No?
So what's stopping you?
...
Oh, I see.
You really think that makes it any better? Makes you any less pathetic?
Just get it over with.
Get it over with.
Do it.
Just do it.
Get. It. Over. With.
Now, Akari, do it.
Your eyes, your chest, your arms, just do it.
Your neck, Akari, do it.
Your neck. Your neck. Your neck.
Don't struggle, Akari, your neck. Your neck. Wrap it around. Let them wrap around. Let them pierce your skin. Sink a blade deeper into your skin.
The air, Akari. Don't breathe. Don't move. Don't struggle. Let them tighten. Let them coat themselves in blood. Tighten it. Sink it deeper.
The cold, the cold wraps around your neck. The cold sinks in. The cold draws the air away. The cold is suffocating. The cold is intoxicating. The cold is killing you.
The cold is warm.
Cry, cry and struggle and desperately scream, there will be nothing but cold. Nothing but air you can't breathe. Nothing but the blade, the cold that wraps around your neck.
Your neck. Your neck. Your neck, Akari.
Your neck. Your neck.
Akari, your goddamn neck.
"S**t..."
His free hand rose slowly to his neck, his body trembling as his eyes darted between every inch of the pool that had been growing on the ground. He wasn't sure if his tears were mixed into the red or not, if there was any in the first place.
With one slow, hesitant, gentle motion, he wiped the horrifying amount of blood from the wound and brought it in front of his face, which only led to more distress. His head fell even further and his jaw dropped slightly out of desperation for breath, as well as just pure shock and panic.
A few curses were let out to say the least, but somehow he managed to get up and dart to the closest sink, his hand gripping his throat as the world spun around him. God, that only made it worse but-
Don't think about it, just clean this mess up.
And with that, he turned on the faucet.
Kubo Atsushi
Akora... a vet... is he calling me a dog?
Yes, that was it. Hmm...
"Dog for you- only your dog." He yawned. The black static was making everything feel less real. Only Kaoru's dog.
He pawed at Kaoru's leg, which was shaped weirder than he remembered it being. "Only a dog for you..." Since when had she dyed her hair white? Hmm... oh well. That didn't matter.
Lucian Arbred's POV
What? What? WHAT?!
Lucian's brain short-circuited. ...his... Dog?
At first, he couldn't even form the words.
Kubo seemingly... Pawing at him with his hands.
"Only a dog for you..."
Lucian's eyes widened. No! What did Kubo mean by that?
"K-Kubo! Of course you're not only my..." His face reddened at the implications. "...dog. You're my..."
He struggled to find the words. What... Even were they? The two of them?
Messes. Absolute mental messes that attempted conversation. He swallowed, pausing. Pondering over it for a moment.
"You're my friend, Kubo. And... My client."
Not my lover, though. Never my lover.
His heart stirred in his chest. The rise and fall of each breath seemed to change.
And Lucian had only one thought on his mind. He wanted to reassure Kubo, that...
That he mattered to him.
"You'll never be just my dog. You're Kubo... And I lo- like you a lot. You mean a lot to me."
He smoothed Kubo's hair away from his forehead, and kissed him gently there.
...wait.
F**K.
HE'D BEEN UNABLE TO CONTROL THAT UR-
Lucian's eyes widened. "I-- I hope you didn't mind! I- I just... I-"
Oh my god. I am... Clearly going insane.
He inhaled sharply, his face steaming. "I just- you know, y-you're.... My friend and my client and I-"
Oh god.
Oh god.
Oh my god.
It all blurred together.
The words the words the words
The breathing
His lips unable to control meeting Kubo's skin
F**k
F**k
GOD
GODDAMMIT
GOD F**KING DAMMIT
PLATONIC. IT WAS A PLATONIC GESTURE.
SAY THAT, YOU IDIOT! SAY IT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
"S-Sorry... That was... A si-silly thing to do..."
Lucian felt queasy.
He wanted to run out of the room, but he couldn't just LEAVE Kubo there!
Just-
Ugh-
AUGH.
Sawyer Laurens's POV
Sawyer hummed to themself, clicking their tongue every so often. Tapping on the floor. Blinking. Knocking their knees together..
It was funny.
So funny. The things that came to you.
Others didn't.
I remember her eyes...
She shouted something...
She? Who?
"One choked his little self, and then there were niiiine!~"
...
Nine little soldier boys. Click click. Click click click.
The kitchen, always the kitchen.
"Nine little soldier boys sat up very late..."
...
Why did they sit up late? Maybe they couldn't sleep?
Just like...
"One overslept himself and then there were eight."
...
"Sleeping pills, Monty?"
...
"I thought they..."
...
"Eight little soldier boys, traveling in Devon..."
Traveling. Who was...
...
Oh.
How disappointing.
Sawyer frowned.
"One said he'd stay there, and then there were seven!"
Vacation. Vacations were nice! So smiley.
Wait, what was...
...
"Seven little soldier boys, chopping up sticks..."
...
The fire. Why was there fire?
"One chopped himself in half, and then there were six!"
Right...
Just like...
Like what? Why was...
...
No that wasn't
I think
I know I mean
No it's all wrong
I think I
....
"Six little soldier boys playing with a hive..."
Hives, in the woods...
Woods, funny.
"A bumblebee stung one, and then there were five."
...oh. Bees.
Buzzbuzzbuzz. Buzzbuzz.
Sort of buzz a crazed fanboy makes.
...
A fanboy?
"Five little soldier boys going in for law..."
...
Law?
Oh, right. School. Boring.
...
The trial... For...
"One got in chancery, and then there four."
Pfffft. Four didn't even rhyme with law anymore.
"Four little soldier boys going out to sea..."
...
Sea...
Like...
"A red herring swallowed one and then there were three."
Red herrings. ...what did those mean again?
"Three little soldier boys walking in the zoo..."
...
"A big bear hugged one and then there were two."
...
"Two little soldier boys, sitting in the sun."
...
"One got all frizzled up and then there was one."
Was that what happened? When...
"One little soldier boy left all alone..."
Sawyer paused. How did the last line go?
No, he didn't get married. There weren't happy endings like that.
Kaoru smiled at them and disappeared. Sawyer froze.
"...Kaoru went and hanged herself."
...
"...and then there were none."
Kubo Atsushi
"Not... your dog?" It didn't make sense. None of it made sense but- why was she coming closer why was- ah- His eyes went wide.
Kissed... me?
That was it. That wasn't Kaoru. That was Lucian.
Lucian...
Kubo took Lucian's face in his hands, brought him close, and then met his lips with his own.