Don't have an account yet? 
Forum Thread
My Life, But As Gravity Falls
Forum-Index → Fanmades → Fanfictions → My Life, But As Gravity Falls
Posted: Thu, 03/09/2015 22:45 (9 Years ago)
This is a fanfic about my life, but if it was in the story and setting as Gravity Falls!
it takes place in Gravity Falls, Oregon, the made-up setting of the show, and all places from the show are there, and YES there is spoilers.
in this, my identical twin, Pikachusforeva, isn't going to behave like a 2-year old, and we will be normal, as well as us being, well, IDENTICAL.
Also, me and my sis will be 12 in this because with dipper and Mabel being 12 I just want to ok ok.
soooo, here's who will be who:
Dipper Pines: FF2 (me)
Mabel Pines: Pikachusforeva
Grunkle Stan: My mom, called 'Laurie' in story (I HAD NO BETTER IDEAS OK. AND WHAT SHE'S CALLED IN-GAME IS MY MOM'S MIDDLE NAME.)
Wendy: Princess_Peach, called Star or Starling in story (But no crushes thing oh god no)
Soos: Allicat, called 'Alli' in story, most time
The Author: LapisLazuli, called Amber in story
Gideon Gleeful: Zacharie, called 'Dorito' in story
Robbie V.: NarutoGirl, called 'Nara' in story
Pacifica Northwest: GravityFallsFanGirl, called 'Lizzie' in story
Old Man McGucket: TBA
Candy: -Mini-, called Mini in story.
Grenda: TBA
Waddles: my cat Spike
Gompers: Gompers (some will just be themselves bc i'm la zy)
Bill Cipher: Bill Cipher
So yeah!
Chapter 1 is going to be up soon!))
Posted: Fri, 04/09/2015 03:20 (9 Years ago)
Title: Chapter 1: Welcome To Gravity Falls, Oregon.
trees,
houses,
road,
squirrel,
more trees,
signs,
trees,
trees,
MORE STINKIN' TREES.
I looked over at my twin,
we always called her Pika.
"Oh! and look! eraser!"
"Pika, NO ONE wants to play 'Bus seat treasure hunt!'"
She rolled her eyes at me.
"Don't deny it! you dooooo~!"
I crossed my arms.
I DID NOT EVER want to play that!
I stared out the window until the bus stopped.
we were outside a building called,
'The Mystery Shack'.
place looked a bit beat up.
"Pika, we're here."
"WOO HOO~!"
I quickly sketched an outline for the building on my notepad.
we both grabbed our stuff and went to the bus door.
I handed my last dollar to the bus driver.
"Here." I mumbled, not excited for this summer.
We left the bus silently.
well, I WAS SILENT.
"ohmygosh we're here! and OHMYGOD! IS THAT A GOAT?! Remember when we were little and went to the zoo and the the goats and how we loved playing with them! rember your favorite, Yodel?"
I got upset at the mention of the black and white goat.
the thing died a few years ago, and I was pretty upset.
"Don't mention Yodel." I muttered, pulling the end of my hat over my face.
"Let's go!" Pika said, running to the door.
"PIKA! WE DON'T KNOW WHERE WE EVEN ARE! ARE YOU INSANE?!"
"Of course we know where we are! Gravity Falls, Oregon!"
I rolled my eyes, and walked over, besides her.
I knocked on the door, and pulled the end of the hat and hid my eyes.
"Hello?"
we looked up.
"Hello, Ma'am, Um, our bus from Piedmont, California, which our parents told where to go just stopped here."
after 20 mins of talking, we learned we were meant to go here.
"Look at all the dust up here!"
"I guess no one goes up here much, eh?" I asked, sneezing again.
my side of the room, mostly had books, papers, notebooks, sketch books, manga, more notebooks, more sketch books, and a bunch of pencils and pens.
me and Pika's side of the room were seperated by a table, with a lantern next to my bed, some books on the other side, and a small dresser with a lamp on it next to Pika's bed.
While Pika's side had a handful of her stuffed animals, some posters for things like 'Shaun The Sheep', which she was currently putting up, and some little figurines.
I finished un-packing and kicked my suitcase back under my bed.
I wandered over to Pika's side of the room.
when I looked back,
Gompers was on my bed.
"Really goat?" I muttered, shooing it off my back and down the stairs.
Now, I was the more depressed and easily annoyed of us.
"WOOOO! IMMA LOG!"
I shooed all the birds away, and tried to keep my sketching going.
and I got sprayed by a water gun, soaking me and RUINING my sketch.
"HEY!"
I glared at the person next to me.
that was our, relative, Laurie.
and I was getting sick of the pranks!
the question about this place why people come this......oh what was it called?
Oh yeah!
tourist trap!
lame?
yes.
boring?
yes.
everything there being fake?
YES.
and me and Pika got to work there.
BOO!
days were boring, and pretty stupid.
but then there was one day where things turned RIGHT AROUND~!
"Ok, I need someone to put up these signs in the spooky part of the forest."
me and Pikalooked at each other.
"NOT IT!" we exclaimed.
"I don't wanna be it ethier. although......maybe BEN Drowned would be there!!!"
"Um, this question wasn't exactly directed at you, Allicat. and, creepypastas DO NOT exist."
"A. it's Alli, and B. what EVAH!"
"Starling."
Starling, had her headphones on, ignoring outside noises.
"Well, one of you is gonna have to."
well,
whoop-de-freakin'-doo......
"you're going."
I got to go?!!!!!
"What?! Seriously? Why me?! Every time I go into the woods, I feel like I'm being watched or.......followed..."
..
......
was it something I said?!
"not again with this FF2....."
I stamped my foot.
"But I mean it!!! look! today my mosquito bites spelled out 'BEWARE'!!!! See?"
I held my arm out.
"That spells 'BEWARB', which is not a word. the monsters thing is fake ya know."
I crossed my arms.
"Stop being so scared!"
I growled and took the signs, and then left the building.
"Why doesn't any human being on earth belive a word that comes out of my mouth?! they always act like I'm lying! even when I'm not! oh FF......you need t get a hold of yourself...." I yelled, hanging up a couple of the signs on the trees.
Clang! Clang! Clang!
huh?
I thought trees were made of wood, not metal....?
I pressed my ear to the tree and tapped the hammer.
Clang! Clang!
I dusted the tree off, resulting in a mini-coughing fit, and managed to pull it open.
there was some sort of box.
looked broken and old.
I played with the switches for a bit and then.....I heard a.....something.
"What's that?"
I ran over,
inside there was creepy spider webs and a book.
I pulled it out, blew the dust of, resulting in ANOTHER mini-coughing fit.
it was red, with yellow edges, and a bit of yellow on the spine of the book.
in the middle there was a yellow hand, with six-fingers and in the middle of that, in large numbers, was the number '3'.
I sat with my back to log, and opened it.
'Property Of'
there was some eye glass thingy, I picked it up, looked at it and set it back.
I turned the page.
'It's hard to believe it's been six years since I began studying the strange and wondrous secrets of Gravity Falls, Oregon.'
"What..............?"
I turned a bunch of pages.
'TRUST NO ONE.'
I began reading aloud.
"'Unfortunately, my suspicions have been confirmed. I'm being watched. I must hide this book before he finds it. Remember: in Gravity Falls there is no one you can trust.'
I tilted my head in confusion.
"No one?"
"HEZSHAUNTHESHEEP!!!!!"
I screamed, stood up, turned around, hid the book behind my back, dropped it and kicked it back to it's hiding spot.
"What'chya got? you seemed pretty into that book."
my voice was when it was me TRYING DESPERATLY to do a calm, normal voice, but it kept going to my fear one.
"Nothing! reading? I wasn't r-reading anything! heh heh!"
"Nothing! reading? I wasn't r-reading anything! heh heh! you're not showin' me??"
I sighed, grabbed the journal again.
"Can we go somewhere else?"
Pika was sitting in the chair in the living room, while I was laying on the floor, holding the journal up, over my head.
"I mean-! Everyone always said I was a paranoid, scardey-cat, but according to this book, Gravity Falls has this secret dark side!!!"
Pika threw the cushion of the chair at me.
"No.WAY!!!!"
"And get this! After a certain point, the pages just.. stop, like the guy who was writing it mysteriously disappeared." I exclaimed, giggling excitedly.
Ding-Dong!
??? huh?
"Um, who's at the door?"
Well, time to spill the beans."
She tossed a empty can of beans at my face.
I growled.
"Whoop. Beans. hee hee. This girl's got a date! Woot woot!"
"WHAT?! IN THE FULL HALF AN HOUR I WAS GONE YOU GOT A BOYFRIEND?! WE HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN HERE A FULL DAY! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed.
"I wasn't!"
"Auuuurgh....."
Ding-Dong! Ding-Dong!
"COOOOOOOMIIIIIIIIIIING~!"
and with that Pika was out of the room.
I put the cushion back onto the chair and sat down, continued to read the journal.
"What are you reading?"
I jumped, my hat falling directly off my head, and hid the journal instead pulling some magazine of the table to the side.
"Um.......A Nurse's Magazine?"
"Didn't know you liked Medical stuff."
"I Don't......"
"'EYOOOOO! Say hello to my new boyfriend!"
"Um.....hi......If you dare hurt her I swear to god I'm going to kill you and make sure it's a slow and painful death so you'll regret what you did." I said, the last part in a almost inaudible whisper, grabbing my hat, and setting it back on my head.
"How's it going?"
"We met at the cemetary! he's really nice!"
"what's your name?"
"Uh. Normal... MAN!"
"He MEANS Norman."
"You okay there Norman? you seem to be bleeding."
"It's jam."
"Jam is AWESOME! Told ya I could date someone FF2." Pika finished, smirking at me.
I growled.
"So, you wanna go hold hands or... whatever?"
"Okay! stay here!"
and Pika was gone.
Norman was a klutz.
ok, I am a bit too.
but this is like, unable to practically walk klutziness!
he ran into the wall a bunch and then left.
He seemed......
not....
normal.
So, time to read the Journal!
"'Known for their pale skin and bad attitudes these creatures are often mistaken for... teenagers?! Beware Gravity Falls's nefarious...'"
my eyes widened.
"ZOMBIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I began hyperventilating.
outside, Norman was doing that...zombie walk.
"Haiyo."
I slammed my hand against the window a bunch of times.
"PIKA!!!!!!! WATCH OUT!!!!!!!"
"PIKAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
you probably don't care about me panicking, but basically he gave her one of those daisy necklace things.
I don't get those.
"Oh.....Am I going insane or is that...Norman really a zombie?"
"It's problem. but is it a fabulous one or normal one?"
I looked over.
"Alli?!"
"I couldn't help but overhear you talking aloud to yourself in this empty room."
"Do you think this Norman is a zombie?"
"Look, dude, I believe you. I'm always noticing weird stuff in this town. Like the mailman? Pretty sure that he's a werewolf. oR MAYBE SOMETHING COOLER LIKE THE RAKE!"
...
when was that-?
"But ya gotta have evidence. Otherwise, people are gonna think you’re a MLG cuckoo clock. HASHTAG NOSCOPE!"
"Yeah...."
"I know. as for I am a fabulous VOCALOID."
"........What?"
Alli left moments later.
But, yeah I needed evidence.
All the evidence was....plain weird.
THAT WAS IT.
I WAS DONE.
"Sis, we need to talk."
"'bout what? Shaun the sheep? Teletubbies? what?"
"Norman."
"Isn't he great?!"
"Uh yeah, no."
"Look! what happened!"
Pika had a HUGE bruise on the left side of her face.
"ARE YOU OK?!"
"Ha ha! It was just the leaf blower!"
"Pika............"
"Fun..."
"LISTEN!!!!!!! I'M PRACTICALLY POSITIVE NORMAN ISN'T WHAT YOU BELIVE!!!" I yelled, pulling the Journal out.
"What?"
"Look!" I exclaimed, opening the book.
it was the gnome page.
"Huh?"
"Oh...wait, my mistake. HERE!"
I put it on the zombie page.
"Zombie? Is this some sort of joke to you?!"
"No! it makes sense though! the blood, limp, way he talks, HE DOESN'T EVEN BLINK!"
"Aaand why does that matter?"
"DO NOT THINK I'M OVERLY OBSERVANT!!!!"
Pika crossed her arms.
"Rember? Trust no one! wh-what if-?!"
"Then why not your own twin huh?!"
"HE COULD EAT YOUR BRAIN! YOUR.BRAIN!!!"
"Listen you paranoid dork! Norman and I are going on a date at five o’clock, and I'm gonna be ADORABLE,"
She shoved me.
" and he's gonna be DREAMY,"
She shoved me again.
"P-Pik-"
"And I am not gonna let you ruin it with one of your crazy CONSPIRACIES!"
and with that I locked out of our room.
"Of course she doesn't believe me......not like anyone does.......ohhhhh......what to do? what to do?"
"Cooooooming~!" Pika exclaimed, pulling a green dress on.
she opened the door.
"Well?"
".........Green."
"Yeah! it's green!"
and......they were gone.
I stared at my camera and sighed.
"I don't have any proof. not like I would. I'm some stupid paranoid idiot................." I muttered.
the video had.....Norman and Pika, but....
Norman's hand......FELL OFF?
he put it back in the video.
"WHAT WAS THAT?!!!!"
I rewinded it and watched it again.
I think I may have been right......
"I was right! Oh dear god! Oh dear god!"
I ran outside.
"And here we have Rock That Looks Like A Face rock: the rock that looks like a face."
"Does it look like a rock?"
"No, it looks like a face."
"Is it a face?"
"It’s a rock that looks like a face!"
"HEY HEY HEY LAURIE!"
"For the fifth time! It's-it's not an actual face!"
I stamped my foot.
Of COURSE! no one's gonna listen to me!
even when I'm right!!!!!!!!!!
"HELLO?! IS ANYONE GONNA NOTICE THE 12 YEAR OLD GIRL JUMPING AND SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS?!!!!!!" I yelled, as loud as I could.
I had been doing this for 10 minutes straight and my throat was beginning to hurt.
BADLY.
I groaned and put my face in my hands.
I looked over to see Star and the golf cart!
maybe-!
I ran over.
"Star! I need to borrow this! important! no time to talk!"
She handed me the key.
"try not to hit any pedestrians. although, WHO CARES ABOUT THEM!"
I smiled.
I got in it and backed up.
"Pssst. Here. for the zombie."
Alli handed me a shovel.
"Arigato." I replied, nodding.
she handed me a camera.
"And here, incase you see a creepypastah!"
"uh.........alright?" I asked, leaving the Mystery Shack.
"I'M COMING SIS!"
"HELP!!!!"
"AGAIN! COMING!"
I got to some magical forest-looking place.
"The more you struggle, the more awkward this is gonna be for everybody! Just, ha ha, okay. Get her arm there, Steve!"
Pika managed to punch the....
Gnome?
and it went and puked rainbows.
wat?
"What on earth...?"
"FF2! Norman turned out to be a bunch of gnomes! And they're total jerks!"
A gnome pulled her hair.
"Hair! Hair! Hair!"
"Gnomes? man, I'm dumb."
I pulled the journal out.
"'Gnomes: little men of the Gravity Falls forest. Weaknesses: unknown.'"
aaand, they tied her down.
yay.........
I put the book away.
"Boo!"
I stormed over.
"LET HER GO NOW!"
"Oh! Ha ha, hey, there! Um, you know, this is all really just a big misunderstanding. You see, your sister's not in danger. She's just marrying all one thousand of us and becoming our gnome queen for all eternity! Isn't that right, honey?"
"YOU GUYS ARE DUMB AND IDIOTIC!"
and she got her mouth covered.
'not in danger' eh?
"Let her go, things will go well. you don't?"
I made a fist.
"You think you can stop us, girl? You have no idea what we're capable of. The gnomes are a powerful race! Do not trifle with the--"
I tossed the gnome to the side.
"Don't care!"
I got Pika free.
we got into the cart.
"He's getting away with our queen! No, no, no!"
we did our seatbelts, and I made the golf cart GET OUTTA THERE.
"You've messed with the wrong creatures, kid!"
I didn't hear the rest.
"Hurry, before they come after us!"
I laughed.
"I don't even think they can run come on!"
BOOM
and a giant gnome monster was there.
"Well...." I mumbled.
"All right, teamwork, guys. Like we practiced."
"GO GO GO GO GO!"
We kept going,
a giant gnome monster hand hit the ground, it missed, fell apart, went back together.
"Come back with our queen!"
"NEVER!!!!!!!!!" I screamed, holding the edge of my hat.
and gnomes were on the cart and destroying it.
a gnome got on the side of the cart,
which we destroyed.
one jumped from behind me,
I gabbed it,
Slammed again the steering wheel,
and the chair, and then tossed him away.
and one got on my face.
wooo.
I tried screaming but that was no use.
Pika punched it, but little did she know.
that was hurting ME as well.
and there went the gnome.
and my hat......
"th-thanks....."
"Not an issue!"
and it threw, A TREE?!
we managed to stop at the Mystery Shack.
YES!
we dashed out immediently.
and there was the monster.
I grabbed the camera, snapped a photo, and grabbed the shovel.
"Shoo! Shoooooo!"
there goes the shovel.
UGH! WHERE IS SOMEONE TO HELP WHEN YOU NEED HELP?!
"It's the end of the line, kids! Pika, marry us before we do something crazy!"
Do something crazy?
THEY ALREADY HAD!!!!
"No! don't!!!"
"I gotta."
"B-But-!"
"Trust me. I know what i'm doing."
"Huh?"
"just-! Trust me!!"
She walked forwards.
"Ok."
"Hot dog! Help me down there, Jason! Thanks, Andy! All right, left foot, there we go, watch those fingers, Mike."
the gnome came out, and held dumb ring out.
part of me was deperate to yell something.
"Eh? Eh?"
blah blah blah, no one cares.
"Bada-bing, bada-bam! Now let's get you back into the forest, honey!"
"You may now kiss the bride!"
huh?
"Well, don't mind if I do."
She pulled the leafblower out.
"Ah! Hey, hey, wait a minute! Whoa, whoa! Wh-what's goin' on?!"
the gnome got sucked half-way into the leafblower.
"THAT'S for lying to me!"
she increased the power.
"THAT'S for breaking my heart!"
"Ow my face!"
I giggled.
"and THIS is for messing with FF! Wanna do it?"
I ran up.
"Okay!!"
"One,"
"Two,"
"THREE!!"
We blasted the gnome at the monster, and it exploded and the gnomes began running around.
we kept blowing it around.
"We could do this for awhile ya know..."
"Hey, FF2?"
"Yeah?"
"Sorry for ignoring you..I'm just an idiot..
"Idiot? you just saved us!"
"Just kinda sad he turned out as bunch of gnomes."
"Hey, next time right?"
"Heh heh. right."
"Awkward........sibling hug?"
"Awkward sibling hug."
we hugged each other.
"PAT. PAT."we wnt inside, leaves all over us, and just,
not in the mood for anything but going to bed.
"What happened, get hit by a turck?"
We looked over annoyed and kept going in the direction to the our room.
"Hey, um, I accidently overstocked some things,so, how about you two take something?"
Pika smiled. "For Reals?"
"And the catch?"
"Before I change my mind."
weboth looked around at the items.
I grabbed a blue and white hat with a pine tree on it, put it on and looked in the mirror.
"Hm, This should do. i like it!"
"And I will have a.....um....."
I looked over at Pika.
"GRAPPLING HOOK!!!!!! perfect..."
Laurie looked at me in confusion.
"Wouldn't she like, a doll or something better?"
I shrugged.
"She's kinda strange."
"Fair enough."
I wrote in the journal quickly.
This book said, there is no one in Gravity Falls I could trust, but I don't think it's right.
I looked at Pika and smiled.
Because if you fight a hundred gnomes with someone, they've probably got your back for life.
I adjusted my hat, and Pika used the Grappling Hook to bring a plushie over to her.
"Can you get the light?"
"Sure!"
she used the grappling hook and there goes the lamp.
out the window...............
we laughed.
"Grappling hook."
"ohmygod yes."
Laurie told us, nothing strange was afoot in this town but,
hey!
maybe there will be more mysteries!
and according to what I've seen in this book,
There probably will be.
((Hey guys!
that took WAY TOO LONG to write! heh heh!
I hope you like it,
some of these will be creative ideas, some will be taken from episodes.
Now,
you may have noticed,
I have some characters listed under 'who will be who' that state 'TBA'.
I have not picked anyone for those roles.
now, this will also have PH users!
So, if you want to be one of the following characters:
'The Author
Robbie V.
Pacifica Northwest
Old Man McGucket
Grenda'
send me a PM with the subjeict 'Who I want to be in My Life, But As Gravity Falls!'
and if you do, tell me.
Who do you want to be?
why do want to be them?
What would you like to be called in this story?
and, do you have anything in common with this character?
Now,
I DO have some thing I want followed with this,
Whoever will be The Author, will be introduced late in the story, like the show. and one character will have that ones name ok ok.
Don't get mad if I don't pick you.
It's my descission!
so, those are what I want followed!
so again,
send me a PM with the subjeict 'Who I want to be in My Life, But As Gravity Falls!'
and if you do, tell me.
Who do you want to be?
why do want to be them?
What would you like to be called in this story?
and, do you have anything in common with this character?
to do this!
Hope to have you in the story!
Bye!))
Posted: Sat, 05/09/2015 02:38 (9 Years ago)
Title: FF2's Guide To The Unexpected: Mailbox
"Hello and welcome back to FF2's guide to the unexpected! Anomaly #54!"
I Pointed at a weird, rusty, old-looking mailbox in the middle of the woods I was in.
"That mailbox. no house, no address. Today, me and my team of paranormal experts,"
Alli walked over to the mailbox, I walked over to it was well.
"HIIIIIIIII~!"
"Will put a letter in and see what happens! Alli, I will not hand it over to you."
Alli cleared her throat.
"My letter contains a serious question. 'I AM A CAT.'"
She put it in the mailbox.
"Now. we hide and wait." I replied, as we hid behind a bush.
the mailbox shook.
"WHAT?!"
the flag raised.
We went back,
"You open it."
"No way am I touch a ghost mailbox!!!!"
"Fiiiine." I replied, opening it and taking out a letter, it wasn't ours.
I held it up to the camera and read aloud.
"'Hello FF2 and Allicat.'"
I pulled the letter away.
"It knows who we are!!"
"What if it's all knowing?!"
"WE MUST TEST IT!"
Static
"What did I draw this morning?" Alli read as she wrote it down on paper.
she put it in the mailbox.
the flag raised.
She pulled the letter out.
"'A dead person.'"
I looked at her in shock and confusion.
"Hey! it got it right!"
"A. WHAT?!!!!! and B. T.M.I."
"WE ASK MORE QUESTIONS."
Static
I wrote and read aloud,
'When is the end of the world?'
I put it in.
Static
I pulled the letter out and read it.
"3012? Huh. We've got awhile."
Static
"'Who is my dream boy?'"
Alli put it in.
Static
Alli held up a picture of BEN Drowned.
"Cooool!"
"...really?"
"Yeah!!!"
"Hm, when is the exact time and date of my death?"
"Did aliens build the pyramids?"
"What about the meaning of life?!"
"Are VOCALOIDS real?"
"Who wrote Journal #3!!!!!!"
"Journal! Journal!!!"
"We're gonna get the answer! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK~!"
Pika walked over.
"A MAILBOX! Perfecto! I wanted to mail mom this video of me sticking 1,000 gummy worms up my nose!"
"What?"
"No no no! Sis don't-!"
She put the video in.
The flag raised.
I pulled a letter out and read it aloud.
"'Your gummy worm video has disturbed and insulted me. You fools are unworthy of my great knowledge. The era of human enlightenment shall never come to pass.'"
The mailxbos started to glow.
"Um, WHAT?!"
We ran off screaming.
the mailbox imploded and we looked burnt, the edge of my hat with a small flame at the end, Pika's hair with smoke immiding from it, e.t.c
"Well, that concludes, FF2's guide to the unexplained, in which, we all have learned, when dealing with supernatural forces,"
I turned and glared at Pika.
"DO NOT MAIL VIDEOS OF YOU SHOVING GUMMY WORMS UP YOUR NOSE!"
She smiled.
"I've got more!"
She pulled out gummy worms.
"Into my nose! INTO MY NOSE!"
I ran to the camera.
"NO NO NO NO! EPISODE OVER! EPISODE.IS.OVER.NOW."
I covered the camera.
Static
JXPPL ZRPV!!!!!!!!!
Posted: Mon, 07/09/2015 00:46 (9 Years ago)
Title: Chapter 2: DORITO
UGH!
Also, all singing will be in bold and ittallic.))
"The tiger was badly injured in the explosion, but we repaired him with a fist."
The tiger on the show punched itself in the face.
"Okay, the show is good but I still don't get that..." I exclaimed.
"Aw, PUH-LEAZE! You don't need to understand it!"
I glared at my sister.
"'Puh-Leaze' yourself."
"Tiger Fist!! ...will return after these messages."
Some commerical started to play, so I just looked at the ceiling.
Alli gasped and pointed at the screen.
"Hey, look. It's that commercial I was telling you guys about!"
I sat back up.
"Are you completely miserable?"
ok, I HAD to respond.
"No."
some random guy on the commerical was crying.
"YES!"
"Then you need to meet, Dorito..."
Pika looked at the screen in confusion.
"Dorito?"
I looked at her.
"Ummm, ISN'T DORITO A TYPE OF FOOD?" I laughed.
"Yeah, actually. it is." Alli added.
"Still, what makes him so special anywho?" Pika asked.
"He's a psychic.."
when TV answers your question....
"Huh whaa?"
I looked at my sister.
really?
SHE DOES NOT KNOW WHAT THAT WORD MEANS?
ohmygod.....
"So don't waste time with so-called 'people of mystery'"
the screen showed a REALLY SLOWED DOWN clip of Laurie coming outside the Mystery Shack and in giant red text the words 'FRAUD' were over the video.
I rolled my eyes.
OF COURSE IT'S FAKE!
and so is every 'mind-reading' thing ever!
so what makes this 'Dorito' person so much better?!
"Learn about tomorrow tonight at Dorito's Tent Of Telepathy!"
then just-
really fast talking I was unable to understand.
"Wow! I'm getting all curiousy inside!"
I smiled, of COURSE she was.
"Don't."
aaand, here comes Laurie.
"Ever since that monster Dorito came 'round, I've just had trouble."
"Well, is he really psychic?"
Ok, with all the weird stuff in Gravity Falls I'd like to know as well.
"Let's go see!" I exclaimed.
"NO! You're FORBIDDEN from going there! No one who lives under this roof is allowed under that.....Dorito's roof!"
"Do tents have roofs, and technically we don't live here."
"Think we just found our loophole!!!" Pika exclaimed.
Me, Pika and Alli walked into the Tent of Telepathy.
"This like, some Mystery Shack rip-off........They even have an Alli!" I exclaimed, pointing at someone who looked a whole lot like Alli.
"IT'S STARTING! IT'S STARTING!"
"Let's see what this is all about..."
curtains opened.
"Hello america! my name is Dorito!"
aaand,
doves.
why do people like this?
"Am I supposed to believe THAT'S Laurie's "mortal enemy"?" I asked.
"But he look like a little kid!" Pika exlcaimed.
"Ladies and gentlemen, it is such a gift to have you here tonight! ...Such a gift. I have a vision. I predict that you will soon all say, 'aw.'"
And I bet he's jut gonna.
yup.
he did some cute thing.
NOT MAGIC OR PSYCHIC.
everyone but me, Pika and Alli said 'aw'.
"It came true!!" Pika exclaimed.
"What? I'm not impressed." I said.
"Sure ya are."
"Sure I'm not."
We went back to watching.
"Hit it, dad!"
aand music.
"Oh, I can see, what others can't see
It ain't some sideshow trick, it's innate ability
Where others are blind, I am futurely inclined
And you too could see, if you was widdle ol' me!
Come on, everybody, rise up! I want y'all to keep it going!"
most people began clapping along, but me, Pika, and Alli didn't.
but, along with everyone else, we stood up.
ok, I didn't actually want to stand up.
"What?! How.....?" I asked.
something's going on here......
"Keep it goin'!"
"FF2! this is amazing!"
"No. it isn't."
"You wish your son would call you more,"
Some person, had a bunch of cats with her.
"I'm giving it all to my cats!"
"I sense that you've been here before,"
And, he pointed at one of the police officers, who had a bunch of stuff relating to the place.
"Oh, what gave it away?"
"Ugh....this is pathetic...." I muttered.
"I'll read your mind if I'm able
Something tells me you're named Pika."
Aaand, this, Dorito,
was right there, and well,
Pika's shirt had her NAME ON IT!
REALLY?
"How'd he do that?"
aand, Dorito was gone, and now back on the stage.
"So welcome all ye... to the Tent of Telepathy
And thanks for visiting... widdle ol' me!"
Everyone,
but me,
was clapping and stuff.
but THAT WAS NOT IMPRESSIVE.
Dorito seemed tiered from that.
"Thank you! You people are the real miracles!"
I adjusted my hat.
"Man, that kid's an even bigger fraud then Laurie! No wonder she's jealous!" I exclaimed as we left.
"Oh, come on. His dance moves were adorable! And he got all that stuff right and-"
"You are WAY too easily impressed."
"Oh please!"
"Check it out! I successfully bezazzled my face! Blink!"
She blinked, some of the gem things falling off her face.
"Ow."
"Is that permanent?"
"you don't appreciate me in my times."
"What...?"
The doorbell rang.
Who could that be??
"Someone answer the door!"
"I'll get it!!" Pika exclaimed, running off towards the door.
I heard Pika cough.
"Pika!! You okay?!"
"Yeah FF! I'm fine!"
"Good!"
after a few minutes Laurie asked who was there and Pika replied 'no one!'
"Hey sis, What's goin' oooon?"
Pika had like, really long, fingernails.
"Um, where on earth have you been?! And what's going on with those fingernails, you look like a wolverine!!"
"I know!!! Rwar!"
"Again, where have you been."
"I was hanging out with my new pal, Dorito. He is FEBULOS."
"Proper English please!"
"I don't trust people who's names are the same as a food brand."
"Oh, leave him alone! You never want to do girly stuff with me; you and Alli always do tom-boy-sih and Otaku things all the time!"
"No we don't!"
Alli ran over.
"You ready to go do some Project Diva?"
"Yeah!!" I exclaimed as we ran off to do the game.
"It's not a date-date, it's just, you know, I didn't want to hurt his feelings and so I figured I'd throw him a bone."
I laughed as I kept hitting the buttons on my controller.
"That's not this ye of things Pik, he's gonna fall in love with you."
"Yeah right. I'm not that lovable."
aaand, she killed me in the game.
"Okay, we agree on something here."
"Hey, hey! What the heck is Pika doing in the paper next to that crazy dodo Dorito?!"
"Oh, yeah, it's like a big deal. Everybody's talking about their big date tonight."
"WHAT?! That little shyster is dating her!?"
I just watched this conversation go from, kinda weird to full on insanity.
"I wonder what the new name will be for the power couple."
"Please, no shipping names..." I exclaimed.
Laurie left.
"I didn't know how bad this would end up as a result!! plus I told her not to."
Laurie came back.
"Yeah, well it ends tonight. I'm going right down to that little dirtbag's house; this is gonna stop NOW!!!"
Laurie slammed the door and left.
"This is gonna have bad results, isn't it..."
"Sooo, what happened?"
"I dunno. I have a lobster for a pet now."
"What...?"
I shook my head.
"At least this is over and you won't have to go out with him again. right?"
I tapped my foot.
"Riiiiight?"
"AUUUUUUUUUUUURGH! I- He-!! e asked me out AGAIN and I don't know how to say no and-"
"Just like this, 'No, I would not like to go out with you.'"
"it's not easy you know!! He's like, a friend! and so I don't wanna hurt his feelings! I just wanna make it be friends again!"
Pika was pacing and talking fastly.
"THERE'S NO WAY OUT!!!"
"Wh-What? Pika?! you alright?" I asked running over.
"I dunno! I mean on th-the date I mean it was friend zone but then HE DRAGGED ME IN THE ROMANCE ZONE! I JUST-!"
"Hey, Hey....Not like you'll have to marry him right? Right?" I asked, trying to make this conversation a bit more postive.
She smiled.
"Great news! you have to marry Dorito!"
Pika's face went to that panicked expression.
thank's Laurie you JUST got rid of the postivie!!
"WHAT?!"
"Yeah, it's all part of some deal, I also got this T-Shirt!"
Pika screamed and ran out of room.
"what? you don't like white."
ok, is everyone dumb today??
Pika was hiding in her dress, rocking back and forth, hugging one of her stuffed animals.
"Oh no.....Pika?"
"Pika's not here, she's at the darkness farm...."
"Ya gonna come out of the darkness farm?"
She shook her head.
"Alright! That's it! if you can't do this, I'll do it for you."
"Really!"
"Of course!"
Pika squealed and hugged me,
and when I say hugged I mean choke hugged.
"Thank you so so so so much!!!"
"Ok! but please- let go!"
"Um.....Hi....."
"Oh, FF2, You seem well. seem well."
I rubbed the side of my head.
"A-Arigato, oh, um, that means 'Thank you', um....well.....Look, we need to talk here. Pika, she um, Can't join you tonight she's kinda weirded out by you....she literally has been rocking back and forth, pacing and like, hiding....It-It's not something that means she's okay, but um, n-no offence or anything.."
"So what you're sayin' is... you've...come between us...?"
oh god.
Dorito did that creepy eye twitch.
GOD.
"You're not gonna like, flip out or anything, are ya?' I asked, cautiosly taking a step back.
"Of course I wont, things like this happen!"
I smiled.
"Okay, then. Cool. sorry, but um, hey thumbs up I guess...?" I asked, doing a thumbs up,
geez I'm awful in these types of situations.
I went to the exit, where Pika was waiting.
"What happened?! did he try to read your mind did-"
"Ha ha! of course not! it's not real!"
"Give me your best shot!"
we charged at Alli and fell moments later.
"Woo~!"
"Glad everything's normal again."
phone rang,
"Your turn." "Your tur- DARN IT!"
I went inside and picked the phone up.
"'Ello?"
"Toby Determined, Gravity Falls Gossiper."
"Oh hey, dude. sorry for the murder accussation last....week...."
"Water under the bridge! Say, we want to interview you about whether you've seen anything unUSUAL about this here TOWN since you've arrived."
"Oh finally! I thought nobody would ever ask! I have notes and theories! Uh huh, ok, 412 Gopher Road. Tonight? Got it."
I opened a warehouse door and looked around.
"Hello?"
Hello. Hello. Hello.
gh.....ECHOS.
The door slammed shut behind me.
"AH!!!"
I screamed, looking behind me.
the lights turned on and I looked behind me.
"Hello friend...."
"ohmygod......Dorito....."
"FF2, How long have been livin' in this town? A week, two? You like it here? Enjoy the scenery?"
"What on earth do ya want?!"
"Listen carefully, girl. This town has secrets you couldn't begin to comprehend!"
"I can comprehend a whole lot of stuff...and, if this is about Pika, I already told you-!"
"LIES!!!! you turned her against me!"
He grabbed the amulet thing and walked over.
I began walking backwards.
"You 'kay there, n-need to c-calm down....?"
He...somehow...levitated me and tossed me over to a bunch of stuff.
"Hi~!"
"Readin' minds isn't all I can do."
"B-b-b-b-b-b-b-but-But you're a fake..."
"Hm, is this fake then?"
He levitated all the sharp things.
I gulped.
I screamed, running and dodging as many items as possible.
"LAURIE WAS RIGHT! YOU ARE A MONSTER! AH!!!" I shrieked, dodging another objeict.
"Pika will be mine!"
I grabbed a baseball bat and stood up, running at Dorito.
but, he levitated me and I let go of the bat by accident.
"SHE.WILL.NOT.DATE.YOU!"
"Liar. and, let's make sure you don't lie again..."
oh boy.
Lamb shears?
ok, nevermind that's an issue, they are like giant siccors.
The door opened and Pika stood there.
"DORITO. WE TALK. NOW!"
"Um, Pika! what on earth are you doing here?"
"Sorry, Dorito, I'm NOT dating you. I had to tell you myself."
"But..."And I was being squished.
like, in the throat area,
resulting in choking.
"Uh! Pik, not the best time! gh-!"
"Hey, but we can still be makeover buddies, right? Wouldn't you like that?"
"For real?"
"NO!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" she yelled, grabbing the amulet.
I fell on the ground.
no more choking!
"YOU WERE, I DUNNO, KILLING MY SISTER!!! WHAT THE HECK!!!!"
"Hey! give that back!"
Pika tossed the amulet to me.
I caught it.
"Can't relly do anything without this, can ya?"
"GIVE IT BACK!"
Dorito knocked, both of us out the window and we started falling.
I looked at the ground.
"Um, I think this is a bad time to fight, we're kinda falling to our possible deaths....." I said, pointing at the ground.
suddenly the falling just- stopped.
and Pika had the amulet!
yay~!
she floated all of us to the ground.
"Listen here Dorito. I'm NEVER going to date you. EVER!"
"Woooo~!" I cheered.
Pika broke the amulet.
"MY POWERS! Oh this isn't over. This isn't the last you'll see of wittle... ol' me!"
Aaand, he was gone.
me and Pika were a big huge mess, and Laurie hung up some creepy painting.
"What happened to you two?"
"Gideon."
"Gideon...."
"Gideon! yeah, little freak, 'swore vengance on the whole family.' pff, how's he gonna do that?"
I smiled.
"Oh, yeah. Yeah, how's he gonna destroy us now, huh? Try to guess what number we're thinking of? ha ha ha!"
"He'll never guess what number I'm thinking of. NEGATIVE EIGHT! No one would guess a negative number."
I laughed harder.
we all just laughed and joked on it.
Yeah.
how COULD HE 'destroy' us now.
Ha ha!
((So yeah!
that was chapter two!
this way to long.
hhhhh-
oksobyebecauseifIdon'tstopnowimintrouble))