Forum Thread
The Derp Stories
Forum-Index → Fanmades → Fanfictions → The Derp StoriesTHERE WAS ON- oh, sorry. Caps was on. Anyway, there was once a 12 year old girl named Victory. Victory was a derp. "I am such a derp." She said one day. "You think?!" A boy who was walking by said. "Yes. I think I'm a derp." Voctory agreed. "Is that a challange?" The boy asked. "No." Shook her head. "Fine! You asked for it!" The boy said as he dropped the books and papers in his hand and charged at Victory. As the boy was about to headbutt Victory, she suddenly felt hungry and went to get a hotdog. And, well, the boy charged into a brick wall that just HAPPENED to be on school property.
Me: *Glares at a bunny rabbit*
Rabbit: Hey! What did I do?
Me: You do know that boy got amneisa, right?
Rabbit: Hey! It wan't my fault! Chester told me to do it! *Points at a cow*
Me: Oh, Chester did NOT tell you to do it!
Rabbit: Yes he did!
Me: Dude, everyone knows you put the brick wall there because you wanted to eat that creampuff!
Rabbit: *Sigh*
Me: Oh would you look at the time. It's time for this issue to end. Goodbye, guys.
Rabbit: No! Wai-
Will the rabbit and I ever make up? Find out next Wensday!
sKITTYCARPY.
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Title: Issue 2
Victory, being the derp she just happened to be, ordered a corndog instead of a hotdog. She sat down and ate her corndog, including the stick. A girl saw this and laughed at her. "Like, lol! Who does that?" She spat. Victory turned to the girl and spit out the stick, right into the girl's left eye. "Like, omg! Help, like, me!" The girl screeched as she ran away. Victory got up and walked up to a fire hydren. "Moo." Victory said as she kicked the fire hydren. "Hey?! What was thet about?!" The fire hydren asked suddenly. "I am a derp." Victory replied. The fire hydren pulled out a sword and-
Me: Hey, wait! This isn't how the story goes! Who changed it?
Rabbit: Hahaha! You thought you got rid of me by putting me in an airplane set to Puffyland? Well, guess what dude! Puffyland is only two miles from here!
Me: Wait... you're telling me that Puffyland exists?
Rabbit: Duh!
Me: ... I really hate you.
Rabbit: *Slowly nods head while putting sunglasses on* I know you do.
Me: *Picks up the rabbit and gets ready to throw the rabbit*
Rabbit: You wouldn't throw me if you knew the truth.
Me: What truth?
Rabbit: I am your father.
Me: *Head explodes*
Is the rabbit really my father? What will Victory do next? Find out in the next issue!
sKITTYCARPY.
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Title: Issue 3
Me: *Fixes the story* Okay... let's see if he messes it up THIS TIME!!! *Looks at the rabbit who is tied up with his mouth taped shut in a corner*
Victory kicked the fire hydren saying "Moo." Blah blah blah... here we are! So, she walked away from the fire hydren, who DID NOT scream at her and pull out a sword. Victory then tried to cartwheel, but she cartwheeled right into a random river which should not be near a school because of saftey issues. She started rolling around in the water and caught a fish in her mouth. She came up to the surface and-
Rabbit: *Unties himself and rips the tape off his mouth*
Spits the fish out. The fish swan dived back into the water while Victory-
Rabbit: *Hits me in the back of the head with a frying pan, knocking me out* Hahaha! I have won! Now I can mess up the story as much as I want!
Victory started barking like a dog and cartwheeled into the school, destroying it. And now, I shall go have a can of corn.
Rabbit: *Walks off to get a can of corn*
I have no idea how I'm writing this since I'm knocked out, but will I ever be able to wake up and fix the story? Find out in the next issue!
sKITTYCARPY.
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Title: Issue 4
Rabbit: *Comes back with an empty can* That was so good. Now, back to messing up this story.
Victory went to the Town Hall and renamed herself Geffory. She then went home and picked up her hat. "Hey... umm... I know this is sudden... but... will you... marry me?" Victory asked the hat. "Yes! Yes I will! I will marry you!" The hat replied. So they-
FF2: *Busts in* STOP RIGHT THERE!!!
Rabbit: Who on earth are you?!
FF2: I AM FF2! AND THAT WAS MY FRIEND YOU JUST KNOCKED OUT!
Rabbit: You can't stop me! Because I am the Ultimate Gammer Espresso Rabbit Warrior!
FF2: *Narrows eyes* I can take you on.
Rabbit: Then prove it!
FF2: Alright then. *Picks up rabbit and throws him to the moon* I HOPE YOU LIKE CHEESE!!!
FF2: *Looks at me* I think I'll try to make the story right while she's knocked out.
Okay... all the weird, stupid, and dorky things that just happened ARN'T true. So... where were we before we got so rudly interupted? Ah, I'll just start at some random point. So, she kicked a fire hydren that DID NOT pull out a sword, and she went back to school and saw a boy whoes name was Ben. He was proabably the most popular boy in the whole school. Every singal girl would explode while they would implode for him, which breaks the laws of phisics. Even Victory would have exploded and imploded for him. So, Ben walked up to Victory and the boy gave her a bagel. "Victory..." Ben started before he ran into the boys' bathroom. But, unfourtantly, another boy was in the bathroom and saw that his eyes were replaced by pink hearts. The boy freaked out and screamed because he thought that either Ben had a desiease or that he was starting to go crazy.
Me: *Moves a little bit* Ugggghhhh...
FF2: Oh boy! You're awake!
Me: Why does the back of my head hurt so much?
FF2: Loooooooong story.
Is that rabbit gone for good? Find out in the next issue!
sKITTYCARPY.
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Title: Issue 5
"What the...?" Victory had no idea what the boy just did. So she decided to sneak out of school amd become less of a derp. So she walked up to a cat and asked it which way to Door Land. The cat awnsered and Victory then went on a long, boring adventure that I'm not gonnna write about because Door Land was two centimeters away from Victory. So, she went to Door Land and walked up to a TV which was playing basketball with an icecream cone. "Is there a way to make me less derpy?" Victory asked the TV. "Of course!" The TV replied. "All you have to do is BELIEVE that you're not derpy!" The TV said. "Okay. I believe I'm not derpy." Victory said. But she remained derpy. Which is good because of she was not a derp this series would be less funny. And then there would be no use in the name. I mean, why call it "The Derp Stories" where there is no derp?! I mean, come on! Common sence, people. We all have it. Anyway...
Rabbit: *Bursts throught the door with a human*
Me: What the what?! Who on earth is that?!
Human: I am... umm... who am I?
Rabbit: You're... umm... Doctor Newhuglollipop!
Human: Oh. Okay. I am Doctor Newhuglollipop! And we are here to steal your soup!
Me: Nooo not my soup! Anything but my soup!
Rabbit: Doctor! Steal their soup!
FF2: *Pulls out a fake flamethrower* I KNOW HOW TO USE THIS!!!
Me: FF2! Where did you get that? It's ao epic! I want one!
FF2: Here, have one! *Tosses a fake flamethrower to me* It shoots extreamly hot water instead of fire, so in reality it's just an epic watergun.
Me: *Catches fake flamthrower* Thank you! Now, you will never steal our soups!
Rabbit: Yes we will!
Will the rabbit and Doctor Newhuglollipop steal our soups? Find out in the next issue!
sKITTYCARPY.
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Title: Issue 6
Me: *Shoots boiling hot water out of the fake flamethrower, missing the rabbit and Newhuglollipop*
Rabbit: Haha! You failed!
FF2: Pff yeah right. *Shoots boiling hot water out of the fake flamethrower, hitting the rabbit*
Rabbit: Ow! Retreat! Retreat! *Runs away with Newhuglollipop*
Me: Haha you did it, FF2! Come on, let's keep doing the story.
Victory was upset that she was still a derp, but that was okay with her because being.. umm... there was really no reason she was fine with it. So... she decided to go home and eat a raw egg. So thats what she did. And she really enjoyed the raw egg. But then she saw that dude that had run into the mens' bathroom and all that stuff who's name I forgot. So, Victory went to a pet adoption center and bought a cat who she named Mouse. So she took Mouse home and fed it and gave it water. So Mouse ate his food and drank his water and fell asleep. When Mouse fell asleep Victory ate more raw eggs and then fell asleep as well on her couch. After a few minuyes, a teacher from Victory's school busted in. "Victory! You got a Z in ebery singal subgect that ever existed! Even the ones we never taught in the school you got a Z on! And I never knew Z was a grade! So this must be very bad!" The teacher said. Victory was eating a raw egg when the teacher busted in, so Victory swallowed her raw egg and tossed a raw egg to her teacher. "Here, have a raw egg!" Victory said as she tossed the egg at her teacher. The teacher, of course, wasn't expecting a raw egg to be thrown at her. So, the teacher got it all over her cloths. Just as the teacher was about to yell at Victory, Mouse started sleep walking and pounced on the teacher's head, making the teacher run into Victory's bathroom amd punch a hole in her bathroom wall while Mouse jumped off of the teacher's head.
Me: I think I hear that rabbit again-
Rabbit: *Busts in out of nowhere and takes a bowl of soup* MWAHAHAHA!
Me: No! My soup! *Throws a rock at the rabbit and misses*
Rabbit: You're aim is worse than my pet tree's aim. PEACE OUT, YO! *Runs away agin*
Me: HE STOLE MY SOUP! GET HIM! *Runs after the rabbit*
Will I ever get my soup back? What will Mouse do next? Find out in the next issue!
sKITTYCARPY.
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