Forum Thread
Kara's Journal~
Forum-Index → Diaries → Kara's Journal~June 6th
Hi. I'm Kara. I'm thirteen, have major depression, really bad anxiety, and I hate talking to people.
Most people think people with depression get over it, but we don't. Actually, its with us for basically our whole lives.
My sister, Kait, has anxiety too. Hers isn't as bad. But she doesn't have depression.
It really sucks. When I lose something important to me, it all goes downhill. I usually end up locking myself in my room until someone breaks the door down.
A few days ago I lost someone very important to me. I know, this'll sound stupid, but she was my cat.
She was twelve, I got her when I was almost a year old, so she was with me for most of my life. When I learned she had to be put down, I didn't speak to anyone. I talked to the cat. I talked to my other cats, Sassy and Chase, as well. I shut myself out from humanity and let myself die.
My friends found out pretty quickly, and ended up dragging me out of my room. I'm not a people person. I don't like talking to complete strangers. It scares me a little. Anxiety levels rise, and then I freak.
It was easier having Brooke, because I knew when I came home at least ONE living creature realized I was alive.
Well, I guess I'll go.
So I've spent the last two hours listening to the same three songs.
Hurry Up and Save Me
Undertale MAP
Up all Night ~
It's been the shortest two hours of my life. I learned that the floor in the corner of my room is extremely comfortable.
June 7th, 2016. 5:47 In the Morning.
Today in school we're going on a "field trip"
*slams head against table* Another hour-and-a-half before school starts
8:39 PM
*pats friends back*
My friend just got rejected by her best friend iui. So everyone's in a pretty bad mood right now.
Its awkward now because my friend group is really good friends with THAT OTHER FRIEND GROUP
So now everythings pretty darn awkward between all of us, and its basically female group vs male group, and then theres me and Mike in the middle trying to calm everyone down.
June 8th, 8:28 PM
I think I'm losing my mind. I've started blaming myself for my cats death. I know I have depression and anxiety and stuff, but I didn't think it would get to the point that I would get so depressed I would have.. thoughts? Yeah, thoughts.
So today was field day, and it got ugly. It was all out war. Someone accused someone else of cheating, and they attacked them. It set everyone off the edge, and everyone was running around, fighting with each other.
Then someone started strangling someone else, and everyone seemed to like that idea.
I was lucky. A lot of people weren't as lucky.
SO IT MIGHT BE WORSE THAN I ORIGINALLY THOUGHT. My jaw is killing me. Now everyone thinks I may have broken it. Great.
I've spent a few hours in the ER, while the nurses are debating on wth to do with my jaw, because now they know for a fact that its broken.
G'morning! There's four and a half days of school left for me! I literally can't wait! I'm so excited for summer! The only problem is that I probably won't see half of my friends over the summer, like Mike and Liam. I know it sounds weird to have guy friends that you would trust with your life, but I would trust my life to them in an instant. Liam has always thought of me as a younger sister, and he's really overprotective of me. Mike
My friend is moving to Texas over the summer. It's cheaper than here. Then again, her family has the biggest house in our town.
Liam has a tumor in his head. They have until August to get it out, they think. It's only a few skin layers deep, according to Liam.
He's been even more annoying, if that's even possible! It probably isn't, is it?
I literally can't do anything in school without Liam. He's so sweet to me, but really overprotective. Let's keep in mind I'm only 5,1. Liam's almost 6,2. He's almost a foot taller than me. So he's kinda scary looking. Nobody wants to screw with him.
YES! One more day of school! Also, heres a link! YouTube. Never said you had to click it.
Hey-o. Gotta lot of stuff I gotta get off of my chest today.
My best friend just tried to commit suicide today. He said he was sick of everyone arguing, and he wanted some peace and quiet. Nobody listened to him. He tried to overdose.
I was glad he texted me. I may as well have flown over to his house, and locked him in a closet until his parents got home, which is what I did.
When I let him out, he completely broke down. He was full on bawling. He also kissed me, but he wasn't in his right mind. He was a mess today.