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I'm Feeling Lucky
Searching for: Posts from Dorky.|
Dorky OFFLINE   Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Thu, 19/01/2023 22:35 (1 Year ago) |
Akora Menx, Ultimate VeterinarianAkora stared at the photo on the secrets board. She had still been in there, at that moment, staring in devastation. Only now tearing herself out of her thoughts. No. Nonono. It was all a coincidence... wasn't it? They couldn't know. They couldn't. She ran all the way back to her dorm. ...where, she found, Sawyer Laurens and Darcy Harper. Oh... great. She couldn't be alone right now. She forced a weak smile upon her face. "Ohhhh, hiiii, person! Have we met?" Sawyer exclaimed, gasping and wide-eyed. "Her name's Akora! She's- my roommate," Darcy explained. "She... helped me with my hand." "You look... different, Darcy. It's- great to see you." Although... it feels a little crowded in here now. Akora let out a huff that blew at the hair on her face. ...and... it would have been great to be alone right now. This was all so overwhelming. "Yeah! I'm- sorry, Akora, I forgot you'd be sleeping here too. Is... it okay if Sawyer sleeps here with us? They... don't have a roommate anymore... ever since Horatia-" "Ever since Horatia graduated!" Sawyer interrupted with a smile. That one slowed track from School-Live!! began playing. "...Sawyer, what do you mean by-" She was dead, wasn't she? They'd all seen the body. But Darcy interrupted Akora's thought. "Oh, would you look at the time! So, uhhh, we should be getting to sleep, shouldn't we? Is- it okay that Sawyer wants to stay in here?" "Pleasepleaseplease?" Sawyer asked, with puppy-eyes, clutching a pillow to their chest. Akora looked at their pleading smile, finding herself reminded of a moment from long ago... "...Alright. Sure, they can stay." "YAY!! Thank you, new friend!" Sawyer chirped, hugging Akora out of nowhere. Akora smiled back at them, but... she really wanted to be alone right now. Sleep would be good, though, sleep would be great... On that note, she settled down to sleep in that crowded bed, eager to escape from her problems... Solaro Makasu, Ultimate SingerShe shuddered. Wow, this whole thing was creepy. REALLY creepy. No, of course the stupid piece of metal didn't know! How the heck would it know about... Solaro saw her slightly bloodied fist. Oh. She'd been punching the wall... Ouch. She'd have to ask Akora to help her with that later. Akora... was she okay? Solaro shook her head, and tried not to think about that. Of course the stupid bear didn't know. But... she'd have to get some sleep for tomorrow. She felt herself growing tired, and this overwhelming headache... Ugh... And, there was that stupid lockdown system, so... With that thought in her mind, she made her way back to her dorm to sleep. The bear didn't know. It couldn't possibly know. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Wed, 18/01/2023 20:02 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred’s POVYou'd wish I could be your girlfriend, boyfriend Am I pretty enough to love back?! No, NOT YET! I wish I could be a girl, and really I'd prefer it if you would use I, Me, Myself Am I pretty enough, am I pretty enough?! TO F**KING DI-I-I-IE!? Little old me in a big world! Well, I would give you my whole world! Little old me in a big world I wish..." "N-No! There's nothing going on between us! It was just a therapy session!" he sputtered, his face reddening and indignant. Oh god.... oh god... why did she have to be here... Sally Face? Mr. Snowflake?... What the hell?... "...r-right. She's... just being weird." He smiled cheerfully at Kubo, trying not to immediately burst into tears. "right... I'll... do that." He waved at him. "...good- good night, Kubo." ...of course. Of course... Of course he didn't feel the same way. It would be just stupid to expect that... haha... haha... Lucian’s hands clenched at the fabric of his sweater, clutching at the fabric so hard, he felt as though he was going to suffocate. He tightened his scarf tighter around his neck, for the dizzy disorientation it would give him, just to give himself another sickening feeling to think of, as the tears rolled down his face to the floor… His stomach twisted with nausea, flip-flopping over and over, but no longer in that warm, soft way it had, as he had learned the feeling of Kubo’s arms and hands tightly around him. …and then he had said what he had said… and left Lucian shattered. ...of course he didn't love him. ...why would he? Why would... anyone? "...so this is what it feels like. To be stabbed through the chest... heh... hehehe..." “...I hope- I hope you’re satisfied, Mei. Did this… make you happy? To see him, to hear him, say this to me?” he choked out hollowly, tightening the scarf further and further around his neck. The painful choking was better than this. It was far better than THIS. “...you’re right. You were right. You were goddamn right. I love him. I freaking love him. U-Unfortunately…” He grinned a shaky grin at her, the tears still pouring from his eyes, like icicles falling from the ceiling of a cave, shattering like the pieces of his heart. “He’ll… never feel the same way. And- it’s- it’s not even your fault, is it? It’s just mine. It’s all mine. I’m not supposed to love. Especially… not supposed to love a man.” He laughed pitifully, tightening the scarf further, clutching it like a lifeline. “I’m- I’m… just supposed to help others. ...and I don't even... I don't even deserve him. So… I guess… thanks for the reality check. Thanks, Mei. Thank you very much,” he choked out. "...thank you very much." Lucian left her at that, slowly limping back to his dorm, a forced, shaky smile upon his face. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of my head. Get out of Get. Out. Of. My. Head… I don’t want to think about you anymore. I don’t… I don’t want to feel this way. I just… I just… need to sleep. I’m sure I’ll feel better in the morning. Lucian slammed the door, and flopped down onto his bed. He buried his face in his pillow, his sobs muffled by the fabric. He gripped at it so hard, that he could have torn it right in half… …it was fine… it was fine. …he could never… mean anything to him. And that was the way it was supposed to be… A happy ending… for everyone but me. His mind carved out the portrait in his mind. Of everyone, happy, smiling. But he’d been torn out of the picture. Just like he should have been. …Kaoru… Kaoru was gone. …she… she’d hugged him tightly here, not so long ago… And the thought made him cry even more… Just take me instead. Why… why did it have to be her? I deserved to die. He wasn't sure if he'd heard correctly. He... must've hallucinated it. After all, it was Mei who had spoken. "Stabbed through the chest, huh..." "Pretty stupid of you to take my words seriously, don'tcha think?" ...of course, she could have said that. That was Mei. Mei would say that. That was real. "...You're not a bad person Lucian." "I'm sorry." ...that... That was obviously a lie. Not just because Mei's voice spoke it, or... he hallucinated her speaking it... ...but because, if he wasn't to blame, for everything, who was? ...and why... would she ever say sorry to him?... he should be the one apologizing... ...yeah. She was right. He sure was stupid. Stupid to not see how much Kaoru was hurting. Stupid to think that he and Kathryn could risk going out that day. Stupid to think that Kubo-- could ever see him as something. Stupid to think he could save anyone. Stupid to think he could help anyone. ...he was just a ghost in a ghost-town, full of people but empty of your dreams. And that was all he'd ever be. Darcy Harper’s POVHe bit his lip. Sawyer would… be sleeping without their roommate. Because… Horatia was dead. “S-Sawyer? Would you… like to room with me?” he asked. Sawyer’s eyes widened. “Like a SLEEPOVER?! You’re on!” They sighed. “Oh, right, the timey thing. Too bad we can’t stay up forever, huh? Well, it was great meeting you, friend! I guess we can have the party sometime tomorrow?” Yeah… a party. While someone could be dying… A pity party… He headed back to his dorm with Sawyer, completely forgetting whoever the hell Darcy’s roommate is, that they would also be rooming with… Sawyer Laurens’s POVA sleepover!! YAYYY!! This was going to be amazing! “Remember the last time we did this?” Sawyer asked, beaming. “It was kinda annoying how your mom made us leave the door open though… I wonder why the heck she did that?” Darcy laughed nervously, his arms crossed. “Y-Yeah… I wonder.” But he looked like he knew exactly why. “Welp!! I can’t wait for the morning! The party is going to be EPIC!! It’s too bad I left a lot of stuff we coulda used for it at home…” Darcy nodded. “Yeah! It’s… going to be great.” As Sawyer paraded on back to the dorm, and Darcy forced a smile at them… only one of them knew it, but all this slightly-twisted happiness… it wasn’t going to last. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Wed, 18/01/2023 02:46 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVOh, he did get it. Or, he was pretending to. Lucian wasn't quite sure. "I'll accept the compliment. Thanks, angel-boy." His face reddened. He'd... thanked him. Angel... Angel-boy, huh? He imprinted the nickname into his mind... He thought of him... as an angel? Maybe in a sarcastic sense. Probably... in a sarcastic sense? His heart was beating so fast... so, so fast... He almost worried Kubo might hear it. "Y-You're welcome. You're... always welcome." He didn't want to ever get up from this spot. But... well... he'd- probably have to, eventually, wouldn't he? This was- hardly appropriate. What was- what was he doing? Hugging his client for so long, like this... Wasn't this... so selfish? He didn't... deserve this, did he? (Actually, I'll just write Daiko's reply here, instead of editing it in)Darcy Harper's POVEspecially certain people. Sawyer's face curled into a pout. "Awwwwwww. Okayyyy. I guess it can still be fun!" "Of course it can! So... I- maybe we should hold it in the Party Room? Or just... somewhere private. Where people can't suddenly barge in." He remembered telling people about Kubo and Lucian's therapy session. But... he figured it was probably best that, well... they didn't tell anyone. Or... was it? He wasn't so sure... "But... what if someone feels left out?" Sawyer asked worriedly. Darcy groaned. "Well, if we don't tell anyone about it, they won't have anything to feel left out about!" Sawyer blinked. "Oh! That's true enough. Okay then!" Sawyer Laurens's POVSawyer suddenly realized by having that knowledge, they had accidentally broken the fourth wall. Because, they had not known if there was a Party Room or not, and the existence of the Party Room was something from last round. Whoops. "If-- there's a Party Room, we can hold it there!" "Umm, sure! When should we hold it? What do you think, Akari?" Darcy asked. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Wed, 18/01/2023 01:53 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVThere's, nothing I won't understand I'll believe, it alllll, III won't let go of your hand" The world seemed to come to a stop. Not one more tear left Lucian's eyes. Kubo Atsushi had wrapped his arms around him, and was murmuring in his ear. He was... He was... So close- Kubo was- KUBO WAS HUGGING HIM? Lucian's face was suddenly feeling VERY warm. His heart pounded, feeling that sort of flipfloppy sensation... Of aching. Of contentment... He didn't mean it. He was sorry... Not the Grim Reaper. ...Lucian wasn't the Grim Reaper. And when Kubo was the one saying those words, suddenly it felt like they were almost true. ...maybe an angel. "I... I do- but... I'm- I'm no angel... You're an angel..." His heartrate quickened as he found himself putting his arms around Kubo back. It was only then that he'd realized what he said. "I-I MEAN! It's... Like you're an angel. Too. You... You help so many people. You save so many people. You don't have to be sorry... It's okay. I forgive you. No matter what..." And I love you, no matter what, his mind added on. Oh god... He- he... He wanted to feel Kubo's arms wrapped around him forever. Lucian began to feel very nervous, that... Well... Maybe he'd said the wrong things. He- he wasn't supposed to say that. Was he? He had a strange feeling Kaoru was very nearby. He wasn't sure why... But am I really an angel? Can angels be born from demons...? Sawyer Laurens's POVDarcy Harper's POV[Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Tue, 17/01/2023 23:30 (1 Year ago) |
Sawyer Laurens's POV"We three shall make the greatest trio of partiers the world has ever seen!" Their eyes shone bright with great enthusiasm, seemingly as bright and infinite as the sky. But deep down, only a reflection of the truth that they struggled to hide from themself, that breathed down their neck in their every waking moment. Darcy Harper's POVHe supposed they would all be having a party. "Of course you wouldn't be a drag, Akari! Don't worry!" he tried to reassure him. But... Darcy had a bad feeling about this. He wasn't quite sure why. "By the way, Sawyer? Where are we holding the party? How are we going to gather supplies?" Sawyer did the dot eyes Kel sprite. "Oh! Good point! Umm... Maybe in one of the dorms! Or OH! Is there a Party Room?! Maybe we should invite some other people too!" Sawyer beamed, hands upon their hips. "Wouldn't want them to feel left out!" "L-Let's not get ahead of ourselves!" Darcy fretted, waving his hands. He had two reasons for his reluctance... One, deadly possibilities, namely Sawyer being an impulsive idiot, possibly. Two, MIYAKO. Darcy didn't know what was going on between those two, but... The image flashed in his mind. Sawyer and Miyako holding hands in the Trial Room. But... Knowing Sawyer, it wasn't like that, was it? Probably not, but... I don't want to lose you to someone else, Sawyer... Haven't I been here for you this whole time? Are you just going to find some new friend, or... Lover, and forget I ever existed?... ...well... He had been. Until that day... Mom always got her way, didn't she? "Well! What d'ya think, Akari?" Sawyer asked, jolting Darcy out of his thoughts. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Tue, 17/01/2023 17:43 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVDon't you dare enchant me with those eyes If I fell through your skies, There's no way you would catch me There's a tear in my heart, But your patch wouldn't match me Being near you still adds to the size of my sighs, There's still seismic events at hellos and goodbyes, And I still need reminders of why it's unwise To stare" [Oh, wow, a random vague Lucian lore segment? Not clickbait?] "Kathy! Are- are you okay?" Oh, god, not again... Kathryn was covered from head-to-toe in bruises again... Oh god... There was a deadly coldness to his voice when he spoke again. "...what the hell did they do to you?" "L-Lucian! I'm fine. It's fine. It's... not their fault I'm so ugly, is it?" "...that doesn't make it okay. And you're not ugly, okay? You're beautiful... you're a beautiful person, in every way! At least... that's how I feel." ...how could anyone do this? To anyone? She smiled sadly at him. "...thank you, Lucian, but... I'm not so sure that's true." Lucian shook his head. "No. Nonono. It IS true. You just can't see it. ...Just, hang in there, okay? I'll go get some first-aid..." It really wasn't fair. It really, truly wasn't fair... How could anyone be so cruel? He remembered... how he came back, with first aid. How he ever so carefully treated the bruises, carefully applying the bandaids... "Thank you, Lucian... I- really don't deserve a brother like you." "...you're right. You deserve even better." ...and he'd been right about that, hadn't he? Because... he hadn't been able to save her. And it might've even been his fault. Lucian... was so sick... of not being able to save people. And just listening to Kubo now... He almost felt like he really WAS a killer. He may not have killed anyone... ...but it was still his fault. It's still always somehow my fault. Because he wasn't enough. He'd never be good enough. And that was part of the reason why... he'd do whatever it took to save others. Regardless of the consequences to himself. Because he didn't matter. What mattered is he could save others. Even if they tore his heart out, stamped on it, shattered it like glass, and threw it over a cliff. Even if they made him want to cry, even if they made him want to die... Even... if it would kill him. Mei was right about him. Kubo was right about him. ...and it was something he couldn't bear. The fact they were both right, in a way. There was no use for him here, no point for him being there. And yet... he wanted to make that a lie. He wanted to help Kubo, no matter how much it hurt him. He wanted to help Mei, he wanted to help Miyako, Setsuna, Mika, Idris, Akari, Darcy, Sawyer, Solaro, Akora, Shi... and everyone else. He wanted to help everyone. ...it was what he was here for. He breathed heavily. "...Kubo. I understand... if- you don't want to have lunch with me. I wouldn't care much for my own company, either... if I was you. But, can I... make lunch for you, please?" If I can make him even a little happier... If I can make everyone even a little bit happier... Then that's all I want. He wasn't going to bring death. He didn't want to bring death. He wanted to stop death. He wanted to look death right in the face, and tell it, "No." You won't take them away. You won't take anyone away. He wanted to hold each person's hand, and pull them away from the brink. Away from the fire, away from the darkness. No more bloodshed, no more pain. He'd give each and every person a fearless smile, and tell them, "It's okay, because I'm here." "I'll always be here." Darcy Harper's POV"No, no, it's okay! What are you apologizing for?" Sawyer tilted their head. "You didn't do anything wrong, Akari! Someone needs another hug!" Please, no, Sawyer, NOT AGAIN. I swear to God... "Well... I don't want to do the party idea if it makes Akari uncomfortable." He bit his lip. "Well, I mean, I don't- know if it makes Akari uncomfortable! But... only if you want to, Akari." Sawyer sighed reluctantly. "Yeahhh, I guess so. It doesn't have to be a party if he doesn't want it to be." Darcy nodded. "Yeah..." My whole life... I've been forced into doing things I don't want to do. I can't force that onto Akari too. Even in regards to something as small as a party. Sawyer Laurens's POVTheir legs swayed underneath the table, unable to sit still. "Like... hmmmm, there are probably other thingies we could do! If 'Karster doesn't want to do that." "...'Karster'?" Darcy asked quizzically. "You literally took the first letter out and added ster to it?" Sawyer blinked. "AH! Whoops! I said that? Haha... whoops. Akari! Right, if Akari doesn't want to do that. Uhhh, Akari, what do you think?" But little did Sawyer know... there wasn't going to be anything to party about, soon enough... [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Tue, 17/01/2023 05:39 (1 Year ago) |
Sawyer Laurens's POVHe was asking them if... they were okay. Sawyer felt perplexed. Everything was okay! Everything was ALWAYS okay. So why was Akari asking if they were okay? "Oh, of course I'm okay! I'm fine! In fact, way better than okay! I'm doing great!" Sawyer responded promptly, almost a melodic nature to their voice when they spoke. Darcy let out a slightly sad "Heh..." before taking another spoonful of soup into his mouth. "Are you okay, Akari?" they asked. "You seem a bit frowny-faced!" Everything about them seemed gloomy, gloomy, gloomy. Like the rain outside, until you realized, it wasn't gloomy or gray at all! It was fun, it was pretty, it was sparkly, it came in so.many different forms. It brought life to EVERYTHING around it! Maybe Akari hadn't learned how rain worked yet. Sawyer brightened, slamming their hand upon the table with a sparkle in their eye. "I HAVE AN IDEA!" they exclaimed. Darcy nearly spat out the noodles in the soup in surprise, at Sawyer slamming down their hand on the table and shouting that. "We should all go throw a party!! There are so many games we can play together, and we can have snacks, and talk, and, it'll be amay-zing! It'll be the greatest thing since hamsters!" Their eyes shone with pride. "It's a GREAT idea! What do you two think?" Darcy Harper's POVBut, Sawyer was just usually nonsensical like that. You really just couldn't question them. A party... Darcy thought about it. Mom had never let him go to parties. And... It really might be great for just the three of them to do. And hopefully not the whole school. Darcy was beginning to wish Sawyer hadn't spoken quite so loudly... "I... Think it could be a good idea. What do you think, Akari?" [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Tue, 17/01/2023 01:04 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVBut I feel like you don't need me When I feel like you don't need me Then I feel like you don't see me And my life has no meaning, drain me Hands out, tryna ask for love But when I get it, I just pass it up Throw it away and think about it later Diggin' through the trash for drugs Wish I could give you what you needed, but I can't I'm scared because I don't see you like I should You look so misunderstood And I wish I could help But it's hard when I hate myself" Lucian stared blankly at Kubo, feeling the words stabbing him through the chest. Once, twice, three times. They echoed in his head. The Grim Reaper. A killer... Everything he despised... ...nothing. He pulled his scarf back on, frantic to hide those scars, and what they made him remember. The shouting, the cutting, the threatening, struggling to escape, struggling to breathe- "...I may be nothing," Lucian choked out hollowly, no longer able to control the tears that rolled down his face. "...but I'm not a killer. I'm not, and I never will be a killer. If I ever become close to becoming that... Then kill me, Kubo. Tear me to pieces, until there's nothing left. Because I'm not going to hurt anyone. ...they can... They can hurt everyone... No, they can't... I... I tried... So many times, to stop it... But it-" Lucian burst into hiccuping sobs. "...don't hurt them. Don't hurt them, please... Take me instead. Please. Beat me instead, torture me instead, r*pe me instead, KILL ME INSTEAD!!! please... Please..." ...I don't want to ever become a killer. I'd rather be nothing. Lucian finally came back to his senses, after a great amount of hyperventilation. "I'm... I'm sorry, Kubo... I'm so sorry, Kubo. I don't know what came over me. I'm so stupid, I'm sorry..." "...but... yeah... I'd... Make you whatever you want. If... You even want to have lunch with me. Why would anyone?..." Pathetic. Pathetic. Nothing. ...not even a ghost. Just nothing. Kubo won't ever love you. No one will ever love you. The only people who did are dead now. And they were wrong to. Darcy Harper's POVLooking at him, and seeing, even through all the layers of clothing... How awfully thin he was... Darcy had a feeling he was VERY hungry. "Yayyyy! Guacamole! Thank youuuu, friend!" Sawyer dashed over and hugged Akari. "Thankyouthankyouthankyou! And yeahhh, you can eat too! Go ahead!" Darcy shook his head and tried not to laugh. Sawyer being Sawyer. Always so excitable over the smallest thing, like a regular Chichi Hazell. Wait. NO DORKY YOU DON'T REFERENCE YOUR OWN NOVEL THAT'S SELF-PROMOTION!! Ahem. Sawyer was... Always proud of him. No matter how he did at things. And in a way, it just made him feel more envy... That they could see things the way they did. That they could do so well at so many things... And yet, this person, could look at Darcy, and think he was something. ...Darcy wished he could be like that. He wished, he wished, he wished. Sometimes... It really feels like it was because of what happened to her... Sawyer Laurens's POVOoh tables. Tables tables. Sawyer wanted to do some math now!! And to flip some more tables. Of course. Ooh.. flipping. Pancakes. PANCAKES!! UGHHHH, PANCAKES. FLUFFINESS. YES. Sawyer popped the ice cubes into the soup and immediately poured their share of guacamole into it. "SAWYER, DON'T-" Darcy groaned, and facepalmed. It seemed he had given up on getting them to be socially acceptable. "What? Why can't I try it?" they asked with a grin. Darcy relented. "Well, I... Guess I don't see why not. Hey, Akari... do you want some soup?" This was the way life was supposed to be. And it felt wonderful. ...too bad they were only dreaming. Darcy had moved, far, far away. Sawyer hadn't seen him in years. Still... It was nice to see him again. A sad smile made its way upon Sawyer's face. Even if this was only a dream, that one day Sawyer would wake up from. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Tue, 17/01/2023 00:13 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVA faraway look came upon his face. "I'm just meant to guide people across the river. The matter of my own life, or my own death, is unimportant. I might as well have never existed in the first place. But if..." Lucian shuffled his knees, and set them down. He exhaled, and reluctantly pulled his scarf down, revealing the scars on his neck. "...if you want me to lay myself bare for your judgment, then I guess... That's your right, isn't it? As a detective. You look at everything, in its essence, and you decide if you seem others to be innocent or guilty. And... As for me... That's not my job. I'm supposed to help people face their guilt, and work through it." He lowered his head. "...I'm supposed to do whatever it takes to help people. Whatever it takes to save them. And... I won't deny you're right. My... Life was messed up, I think. But... I don't want anyone else to suffer that way, like I did. I'll do whatever it takes to prevent that." "...as a detective, you always search for the truth, don't you? And in a way, I do the same. But... Every truth, for everyone is different. And you have to help people find the truth that'll set them free." ...he felt so vulnerable right now, without his scarf on. ...but... I want to help you... So I want you to trust me. Please?... Would you trust me? Sawyer Laurens's POVDarcy was pulling the soup into bowls, and Sawyer pulled on his arm so hard that Darcy almost dropped the soup. "A-Ack! Sawyer! Careful! Maybe you should carry one of the bowls?" Sawyer blinked. "Oh! Yeah! Good point, haha! Sorry, Dace!" Darcy rolled his eyes and picked up the other bowl. He grabbed a couple spoons while he was at it, and brought his own bowl to a table. One that they hadn't flipped over yet. "YAYYYY! SOUP!" Sawyer snagged a big spoonful. "S-SAWYER, WAIT! BE CAREFUL! IT'S STILL H-" "OWOWOW! MY TONGUE!" Darcy sighed and shook his head. "What did I tell you?..." Sawyer frowned. "I was just so excited and sooo hungryy, I wasn't thinking!" "Never mind. I'll just-- go get some ice cubes, okay? Be right back." "Okay!" Sawyer chirped. As they watched him walk away, Sawyer couldn't help but smile. What would they do without him? What would they do... Without Darcy? "Darcyyyyy, hey! It's been a while! Do you wanna come out to play? I mean... If you have time?" They went over and knocked on the door. "Darcy?" There was no response. Sawyer really didn't want to have to do this. Heading into their house unannounced... Wasn't this kinda like, a breach of privacy? Then again... The two of them were friends! This was alright. But then, a man Sawyer didn't recognize appeared at the door. "Heyyy, kid, what do you want?" "Oh! Hellooo! I was just coming here to see my friend! Darcy Harper! Have you seen them?" The man looked puzzled. "Oh... You mean... Mrs. Harper and her daughter? Yeah, well... They moved away, just yesterday." Sawyer stared blankly. "Moved... Away?" "Yeah! They don't live here anymore. Sorry, kid. Do you-" A crooked smile came scross Sawyer's face. "Nah, it's okay! Everything is cool! Thanks, seeya!" They ran. They ran and they ran and they ran. The day was no longer sunny, clouds had covered the sky, it had started to rain. But Sawyer didn't feel like dancing. They found themself on the bridge. That bridge, near Jade Stone Beach... Here again. Where Darcy had But Sawyer didn't feel like ice-cream right now. They sat down on the bridge. ...maybe, if they just told themself, that Darcy was here... Things would be okay? ...why did you leave? Why did you leave, without telling me? You're my friend, Darcy. You're a good person, Darcy. Good people don't do that... Do they? Darcy Harper's POV...best not to think about that. He had to get these ice cubes to Sawyer. Maybe no one else would die. Maybe things would be fine. ...if only he could think like them. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 23:39 (1 Year ago) |
Darcy Harper's POVDarcy sighed. Maybe they should both just leave the poor guy alone. He didn't seem to like talking to others. "Would you like to come eat with us?" Darcy asked him. He felt like he should extend the offer. He didn't want him to feel left out. And it couldn't hurt, right?... Sawyer Laurens's POVThey thought about it for a moment. "Maybe I should go invite Miyako too!" Darcy flinched at the mention of her name. "I'm sure she'd LOVE to come!" "III... Think she's busy right now," Darcy said quickly. "Maybe we shouldn't bother her! Ohhh, look, the soup's done! You coming, Akari?" Sawyer blinked. Huh. Darcy sure seemed in a rush. Wonder why? Did he... Not want Miyako coming here? [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 22:51 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POV"Some people... say they think there's a god. Or gods. Some people believe in fate, others believe in reincarnation... spirits, ghosts, zombies... An afterlife. There are many different points of view I've heard. But, to be honest, Kubo, I don't believe in any of these things, one way or the other. Maybe we all die at the end, and there are no spirits or souls. Nothing left of us. Or maybe that is the case. Or maybe we become ghosts. Or maybe, we're given another chance at life in another form. I don't know." He looked into Kubo's eyes, his heart fluttering as he did so. "...so... Yes. It may not sound all that exciting. But... I don't believe one way or the other. Not that there's something, or that there's nothing. I feel like either could be true, really. ...I like researching Greek mythology, and astrology. However, I'm uncertain if there is any truth to it or not. I guess I'm just... in the middle. Wh-What- do you believe, Kubo? If you're... Okay with answering that. I've never told anyone... What I believe before... And I understand if... You're uncomfortable." He couldn't help but wonder, where Kaoru was now. Was she just... Gone? Was she reincarnated? Was she out there, in some afterlife or other? He'd never know... He supposed ghosts... Might exist, I mean, wasn't that Miyako's talent? Unless... She lied. But he couldn't help but wonder... Why had Kubo asked him that? Ask me to spill my heart out to you... For you, I'll do it in a heartbeat. But I doubt I'll ever tell you these two truths. A metaphorical locket, tucked away, nice and safe, like his mother's scarf around his neck. One truth it held, was that Kubo had his heart. And the other... Was one he never wanted to face. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 22:10 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVGhost in the world, ghost with no home I remember, I remember the days When I'd make you oh-so afraid And this is why I have decided To leave your house and home un-haunted You don't need poltergeists for sidekicks You don't need treats And you don't need tricks You don't need treats You don't need tricks You don't need no Halloween You don't need treats You don't need tricks And you don't need me" Lucian's heart thudded at the sound of Kubo's voice. And... him eyeing him... He inhaled quietly, and sat down next to him. He wasn't quite sure what to say to him. He put his knees up to his chest. He grimaced. "I'm doing great, with or without you." Of course, he was. Everyone was... Maybe they'd even be better without him. He'd come here with the intention of eating something, but he wasn't so sure he cared about that anymore. Lucian wanted to cry, but he felt too tired to cry. And he didn't want to cry. Not in front of Kubo, not in front of anyone. Just... what was with him here? This wasn't that much to handle. Anyone could handle it... Finally, he spoke. "I... wanted to make sure you were- okay, Kubo." He twisted a lock of his hair around his finger. "...earlier, you seemed upset and I- I didn't- like seeing you like that. You don't... have to tell me anything, if you don't want to. I wouldn't blame you if you don't like or trust me." He moved his scarf up, tempted to move it overtop his whole face so he could cry in peace. ... Kubo didn't need him. No one did. So why was he here? Darcy Harper's POVDarcy nodded. "...It's- okay, yeah." Sawyer nodded back. "Oh! Yeah! Darcy over here, is the best guy friend someone ever had. He always has been, but he didn't realize it till today!" "Yep. Yep I am. Haha." Darcy could almost see Mom's disapproving glare. She'd kill me. She'd literally kill me. ...if she wouldn't, for what had happened. Had she known? "But, anyway! It's great to meet you, Akari!" Sawyer exclaimed. "Ultimate Engineer? Cool! I'd love to see your work! You do look like the kind of person who fixes things!" They beamed brightly at him. "Yeah, it is really great to meet you," Darcy said awkwardly. "What are you making?" He wanted to apologize that Sawyer might be a little too overwhelming, but, he didn't want to be rude. He'd have to talk to them about that later. "So... this sure is, a crazy thing, isn't it? I can't believe that... two people have died." He could almost see Kaoru's corpse flickering in his vision. God... why didn't you spare her? What did she do that was so wrong? Then again... who am I to talk? God probably hates me. "Yeeeep! It's a crazy dream, isn't it?" Sawyer remarked. "I'm really curious what'll happen next..." Sawyer, as bright as the sun. And if you stared at them too long, you'd find yourself blinded. But you'd just wish you had that ability... to stare at the sun, and not become blinded. To indulge in the light of life, to be happy, no matter what happened. I remember when you danced in the rain, no matter who was watching... Sawyer Laurens's POVBut you know I know when it's a dream I think I know, I mean a... yes But it's all wrong That is, I think I disagree" Yeah, Darcy. People had died. But not like, actually. It's just a dream, or a simulation of some sort. So why was he so... upset? Wait, was anyone dead? ...no, no one was dead. You'd see that woman you loved, and watch her fade away. Glitching into nothing. Was she ever real, or did you grow ever so attached to the concept? What an interesting imagined concept. How truly remarkable. Maybe Darcy was imagining things were bad. Or-- rather, the dream-projected-image of Darcy was imagining things were bad. Wow... this got convoluted, didn't it? How truly... perplexing. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 21:36 (1 Year ago) |
Sawyer Laurens's POVA potential new friend!! A friend who-- Who- "Hiiii!! Have we met? If we have, I might forgot! Hahahahahaha! I'm Sawyer Laurens, the Ultimate Loremaster! What's your name, new friend?" They quickly grabbed and shook Akari's hand before Darcy could stop them. Darcy looked like he wanted to give Sawyer a serious etiquette lecture. "Whatcha cooking there? It's great to see a fellow Ultimate student!! What's your talent? I bet it's really cool!" As Sawyer's eyes sparkled, the truth lingered behind them. Those shadows that you would tell yourself weren't there. And then they'd sneak behind you, and suffocate you. But, you'd just smile anyway! Nothing was wrong. Everything was fine. Darcy Harper's POVHe self-consciously tugged at his ponytail, suddenly nervous about how people might react to his new appearance. "Um, heyyy! I'm Darcy Harper, the Ultimate Chocolatier. Have we met before?" Sawyer had suddenly begun chattering about how Jevil is probably not actually crazy and might be right about everything he was saying. Darcy sighed and facepalmed. He loved Sawyer, but could they just be quiet for one moment, sometimes? [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 02:59 (1 Year ago) |
Darcy Harper's POVWasn't... everyone here, running from something, when he thought about it? Everyone was. And then they looked at Sawyer, shook their heads, and said... "There must be something wrong with them." But... Darcy realized the truth. There wasn't anything wrong with Sawyer, really, was there?... ...was there? He wasn't sure anymore. But he knew one thing for sure. Saying there was something wrong with them, was an observation most likely born from envy. A feeling Darcy knew very well. Everyone here was in some kind of denial. Everyone here was running away from something. But none of them could run as fast as Sawyer could. He reflected upon this, as he opened up a soup can, and poured it into a pot. ...Darcy could do better than this, of course he could. But, he wasn't in the mood right now. He wasn't so sure he was in the mood for anything. [Sawyer's POV to be added] [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 02:10 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVGreat. That came out great. Way to go, Lucian. ...oh my gosh, he was looking at him. F**k. ...don't think about it, don't think about it. You don't love him, you don't love him. He quietly inhaled and exhaled, trying not to hyperventilate. "Can I... please sit w-with you?" Sawyer Laurens's POV...but... then, they looked at one of the turned-over tables. ...just like... It looked just like... Sawyer shook the thought away. Whoaaa! That was weird. "Uh, yeah, it- really is! This is kind of- huff- exhausting, Sawyer, could we- go eat something?" Darcy asked, after flipping over two more tables. Sawyer sighed. "Wellll, I am hungry. Okayyy! Let's go!" They grabbed Darcy by the hand. Darcy Harper's POVDarcy shook his head. Ughhh... why wouldn't these stupid feelings just go away? Please, don't let this be like the last time. Then, he saw Kubo. With Lucian nearby. He smiled sadly and gave a little wave to Lucian, who waved back at him. I bet those two will make a happy couple, won't they? he thought bitterly. Just like... Just like them. Darcy felt queasy, looking at that photo. He didn't want to remember. ...he didn't want to remember. He headed to the kitchen with Sawyer, and tried to forget, as they began passionately listing food items and their average prices. Jeez. They really know so much about so many things. He never knew where they kept all that information. Then, he had a thought that made his stomach turn. Maybe... it's because of all that they've forgotten. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Mon, 16/01/2023 01:42 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVHe smiled sadly, and closed the door. Mei was the only person who could help Idris right now. Idris was the only person who could help Mei right now. ...they... needed each other. Not him. He was hungry. Wow, wasn't that funny... Such a normal thing, to remind him, that this was all real. That two people had died because of him, and many more might follow. That's how it was, really. You'd be tied up, gagged, with the gun pointed to your head, you'd want to shout out pleas for mercy as they beat you... But no sound would come out. You grew used to not saying anything. You grew so, so used to not saying anything. No one would want to listen anyway. But Lucian wanted to be someone who would listen. His feet found themselves traveling to the cafeteria, ever so hollowly. It felt like walking through a bad dream. Except, it was all real. The bitter taste of blood on his lips told him that. The shaking in his legs told him that. The only things that told him he wasn't a ghost. Even though he always felt like one. It wouldn't matter if he wasn't even here. He found his way to the cafeteria, and he found his eyes widening, and his stomach twisting into knots. The butterflies were back. And he wanted them to fly, far, far away. The ghost had just spotted the detective. The one that everyone needed. The one who would actually be of some kind of use to everyone here. Who would help people. Who would save people. "...hey... Kubo." He released a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding in. Was Kubo alright?... Was... anyone alright? What could he do, anyway? "...can I- please sit here?" God. He just wanted to blurt out all the answers. But there was so much uncertainty in the air. He didn't want to think about love. He didn't want to love Kubo. He... Why wouldn't his heart stop pounding? This was a client, like any other. He was just... going to sit down and talk to him. A sickness stirred in Lucian's stomach. He didn't want to love Kubo. If he-- if he loved Kubo, what if someone wound up dead? Kaoru's dead body flickered in his vision again. Did it matter that he was hungry? Maybe he could just disappear right now... it wasn't like anyone needed him. Mei was right. She was right. And he loathed it, he loathed that. He couldn't help anyone here... Just like back at home. The hardest things to save people from..., Lucian reflected, Are themselves. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Sun, 15/01/2023 23:16 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVHe saw her lifeless body, once again, stabbed in multiple places, bleeding out onto the floor. Dangling and swaying ever so perfectly, a plastic doll. The look of pain on her face. The noose around her neck... The noose... He saw Idris peek out. He felt a rush of relief. He wss alive. He was okay. "Mei... I'm so sorry. After what you said, I spaced out and... When I came back to my senses, Idris was gone. I'm sorry. I know you asked me to watch out for him. I failed. I failed. I'm so sorry... I... I should go, shouldn't I?" His voice wobbled, his fingers clenching into fists. "I might just... Make things worse. Unless you need my help. Although, I doubt you do. I doubt you'd want it, anyway." His voice came out, shaky, hollow, cracked. He stared at Idris, feeling his eyes stir with tears. "...I'm so sorry," he whispered, feeling his knees buckle beneath him, but he gripped at them to prevent himself from falling down onto them. He could have been dead right now, and it would have been all my fault. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Sun, 15/01/2023 21:48 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POV"How kind of you to interrupt this little chat I was having, Lucian" "I-- I'm sorry, I just-" The cold, hard venom in her voice cut sharper than any knife to your throat. Lucian clutched at his scarf subconsciously. "Speak for yourself, and shut the hell up while you're at it..." Speak... For himself. What the hell had she meant by that? Of course. His mouth snapped shut. Just shut the hell up, Lukey boy. Be a good little kid and help me with my homework, will you? Or I'll tell Dad that you-- "I don't need your sentimental bulls**t." ... "It's not bulls**t. It's not. I just want to help you. I just want to help everyone. But I'm not needed. I'm worthless. It's all so useless. It wouldn't even matter if I was dead, it wouldn't change a thing. Heck, maybe it'd be better. Maybe you'd be laughing your ass off at my dulled eyes and fading skin, at my fingers that would never grasp another pen, never hold another hand." Gone. Gone. Disintegrating, into nothing. Gone. Deteriorating into a skeleton, and then falling apart into ashes, blown away in the wind. But Mei was gone. Lucian's eyes widened. Oh god. Oh god. It finally came back to him now. ...Mei had told him not to let Idris do anything stupid, and Idris was gone. Idris... Where had Idris gone? He didn't remember hearing anything. He must've blocked it out. He immediately ran for Idris's dorm. Maybe... Maybe he was there, right?! He had to find him! He couldn't let him do anything stupid! Lucian felt his heart falling to pieces. ...some therapist he was. Maybe Mei was right about him. Worthless. Worthless. Absolutely worthless. Nothing he did would ever help anyone, ever. He should have died in there. [Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Sun, 15/01/2023 19:20 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVShort little gloat, always clearing his throat Like he ever had something to say, And I'll say, When I go… Bury me six feet in snow" … Mei. Even Mei was struggling right now. Mei, of all people. He could hear the breaking in her voice, and empathy stirred within him. His heart lurched. One empty step after another, that seemed so loud in the frozen room. He felt like he was walking on ice, trying not to fall. To reach out a hand to someone who had never learned to skate before… "...Mei… are you okay?" he asked gently, fighting to keep his voice steady. "It's okay that you're hurting right now. Just… take deep breaths. You'll be okay. This'll all be okay, in the end." He breathed deeply, and could almost feel frost igniting the air. Little snowflakes, dancing in the wind. Lucian remembered looking out the window with Kathy, her face smudged against the glass. Snowflakes, so pretty, and yet so fragile. They covered the world with their short-lived beauty, before vanishing, as though they were but visiting ghosts. Haunting the world for only a little while. Guiding people across the River Styx, except it was their journey through life. And this snowflake, and this visiting ghost… Was going to help people through their journeys, in the time that he had. Until the day he melted away. "...Idris… will be okay. We can't let these secrets break us. We've all done things we aren't proud of. What's important is that we learn from them." He lowered his head. "You'll be okay, Mei…" And then he remembered. He remembered… Kathy, clinging desperately to him, so many times. Always so terrified that every day would be her last. And, although he may have been her younger brother, he'd been there to help her too… I'm just here for a little while. To heal everyone, to help everyone, before I melt away… before I fade away. One day. A flickering snowflake melted in his vision. He imagined his tombstone, one day in the future, amongst the many others. Gone without a sound. When? He didn't know when. But for now… he had to live. He was visiting this world for a while. Darcy Harper's POVDarcy tried not to burst out laughing. Pffffft, tables. Yay, tables. Such an ordinary, everyday thing. And Sawyer found so much enthusiasm for it. He realized, briefly, that Sawyer had been holding his hand earlier. His face reddened at the thought which he quickly shook away. "So, we're going to flip these tables?" he asked with raised eyebrows. Darcy… liked this. It almost felt like they were both kids again. "S-Sawyer… should we really be out here, in these woods? It's getting dark, I'm scared…" Darcy quivered. Sawyer smiled at them. "Heyyy! Not to worry! Nothing bad'll happen! If anything comes to hurt you, I'll protect you!" They thrust their fist into the air, and almost fell over. "Gah! WHOOPS!" Darcy quickly grabbed onto Sawyer to keep them from falling. They let go when they were balanced again, and giggled with their hand over their mouth. "Jeeeez, Soy Bean. You really think you can protect me like that?" they teased. "Are you going to like, fall onto the wolves and flatten them?" "HEYYY!" Sawyer crossed their arms indignantly. "Maybe I am! They won't ever see it coming!" Then, a look of realization came upon their face. "Oh! OHOHOH! What if we, like, befriended the wolves? And kept them as pets?!" Darcy gasped immediately. "Sawyer! You know Mom would never let me keep one, don't you?" Sawyer snickered, and then their laughter died down with a sigh. "Yeahhh… probably not. I've always wanted a dog though! Especially huskies. They're super cool!" A blank look came upon Darcy's face. "Sawyer, that's- not the same thing." "Ohh, I know that! But, like, it's kinda similar! And imagine what I could tell the kids at school!" They sat down next to Darcy, and swung their legs back and forth, kicking at the air. Darcy sighed. "You do know nobody would believe that, right?" "Maybe. But then I'd make them believe me! I'd name him Jasper or something! Or, maybe!" Sawyer's eyes brightened. "I'd name it after you, Darcy!" "A-After me? Why?" Darcy tried to fight the urge to smile. "Uhhh, because you're the coolest friend anyone has ever had!" Darcy laughed, but then their smile faded. "Sawyer, do you think we should build a fire? It's getting cold…" Sawyer grinned. "Now we're talking! Let's goooo!" "Have you… ever built one before?" "Nahhhhh. But I could learn, I'm sure! What could go wrong?" Name it after me, huh?... I doubt Mom would ever do that. Erica, Erica, Erica. It was always about Erica. "Mom, look, I got the top grade in this class! Aren't you proud of me?" She'd barely even lifted her head. "Mom, look, I baked this cake for you! Do you like it?" "...It's okay, I guess." "Mom! I won a prize at the school fair!" "Oh, that's nice, Darcy. Go hang it on the wall over there." Mom always loved Erica more. And Darcy never understood why. Nothing was ever good enough… Why? Why did he… "Whatcha drawing there, Darcy?" "O-Oh! Nothing!" Sawyer tilted their head. "WB + DH? Are those yours and Will's initials?" Darcy blushed. "Uhh- no! Okay… maybe." Sawyer gasped. "Are you going to try asking him out?" Darcy sighed. "He's like… two years older than me, Sawyer. And what if he doesn't like me?!" They stared self-consciously into the mirror, feeling like they were going to vomit. "Awww, sure he will, Darcy! Just give it a try!" …He had said no. Of course, he had said no. Darcy Harper was never good enough for anyone. …except Sawyer. But what do they even see in me? "If I could, begin to be Half of what you think of me I could do about anything, I could even learn how to love…" Erica was so good at the piano. And she always seemed to love playing that one song. But… it was always that one part… that stirred Darcy to tears. "I always thought, I might be bad Now I'm sure that it's true, 'Cause, I think you're so good, And I'm nothing like you! Look at you go, I just adore you I wish that I knew What makes you think I'm so special…" Sawyer's bright smile, as they huffed with the effort of flipping a table, and flipping another. Darcy rolling his eyes and trying to join them. And no matter what, Sawyer always saw him. Somehow. A sad smile came upon Darcy's face. Do I even deserve it? Sawyer Laurens's POV[Read more] |
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Dorky OFFLINE Forum Posts: 47 |
Posted: Sat, 14/01/2023 03:42 (1 Year ago) |
Lucian Arbred's POVWhen Dad gets out his gun, you just hide away, as quietly as you can. You don't dare make a sound, you just stay calm. You remain as calm and quiet as you possibly can. Just wait until he calms down. No more Russian Roulette. …and then, came the day, that Lucian convinced people to put down their guns. That he convinced people not to make the jump off of roofs. That living… was worth it. Even if you didn't think so. And as much as Lucian was able to convince those people, and see them walk away smiling from his efforts… He could never do the same for himself. Of course, he had meditated upon the matter many times. As to if he should take his own life or not. At first, he had told himself, he couldn't do that to his mom. And then, it had been his sister. They were both gone now. And then, he frantically latched onto another reason, like a rope, frantically pulling him up from the cliff. His patients. There were people out there, who were suffering. Who had so much to live for, so much to gain. If they only saw it in themselves. Lucian closed his eyes and remembered a movie he saw once. It was called Good Will Hunting. He'd related so much to Sean, he recalled… and it may have been that that gave him the first push. To realize that therapy was the call for him. And maybe, it was that film in part, that made him realize people could all be good if they put their minds to it. Everyone had good and bad parts, and some mixed parts. Deep down, he almost knew the truth. That it wasn't his fault. That if people turned out badly, it wasn't always because he couldn't help them. He couldn't save th- He remembered Kaoru. He could almost see her there, with that crooked look on her face, as she told everyone to kill Kubo. As she insulted them all, and called him a fool. As she… kissed him on the lips, and walked out of Lucian's life forever. As he lost the dearest friend he'd ever had. Lucian knew he couldn't waste time grieving. No, that was just– that was just cold to think about it like that, he knew. He'd loved Kaoru. He'd cared deeply for her. And as his fingers curled into fists, he found himself longing to feel her arms around him again. He'd loved her… but not like that. He'd never loved anyone like that. But, grieving wasn't a luxury Lucian could afford. Life would throw more grief onto you, and you'd just have to dodge the knives, daggers, and arrows whenever you could. But he wasn't over it. Not at all. She's dead. It's my fault. I couldn't save her. Kaoru. Horatia. Kathy. His mother. And so, so many others. Lucian could almost feel a knife in his hands. It wasn't there, he knew that. But he could almost see Horatia's bloody, bissected corpse, stabbed through so morbidly with leeks. The vegetables looked so out of place. Kaoru, hanging for a crime he'd committed. It's my fault. I couldn't save Horatia. I couldn't stop Kaoru from losing her sanity. And it might have even been my fault she did it in the first place. …and part of him… part of him blamed Miyako. No, he knew it was his own fault. But… had she not threatened Kaoru, could things have turned out differently? No one would be dead. Kaoru wouldn't have fallen in love with him. That… hadn't been Lucian's intention. He'd just wanted to help his friend. And here he was, foolishly falling in love with a man who probably desperately needed his help. Daydreaming away about being in his arms, when Lucian should have only been offering Kubo a shoulder to cry on. He remembered Kaoru, clinging tightly onto him. Burying her face in his shoulder. And it stirred him into tears. He never would have left her. He… All of a sudden, he longed to rewind. Maybe if he could have shown romantic interest in her before she hurt Horatia. Maybe he'd eventually have fallen in love with her. And then… and then what? Would someone still have died? And if not… He imagined Kaoru gripping him tightly by the arm, all dressed up in a tuxedo, to have, and to hold, and to kiss. Her precious husband, and Kaoru… his spouse. Maybe they would have escaped this place, or lived here forever. Maybe they would have had their own children together, and everyone else would have told their own stories. Stories of friendships and rivalries and lovers and maybe even children. All brought together by a twisted Killing Game. Or, maybe, Lucian reflected, he could have prevented Miyako's threatening Kaoru. He could have prevented Kaoru falling for him. Maybe, just maybe, if he had realized sooner something was wrong. He could have saved her. He could have saved them all. But Lucian couldn't dwell on the past. He couldn't dwell on all those people he couldn't save. Lost to murders and to suicides and to accidents. Not his family, not his clients, not the dearest friend he ever had and a woman he scarcely knew. And then there was Kubo. Who he had every intention to help, and yet he had gone and fallen for him like a fool anyway. Lucian wanted to lock his feelings away tightly, where they could never be found. But Kubo, unbeknownst to himself, had dug up Lucian's heart and run away with it. While Lucian pined after him, hopeless and empty, with that tingling longing that could only be sated by an "I love you too" and a kiss. When he was supposed to be his therapist. His helper. His healer. He was supposed to be everyone's healer and helper. Lucian wasn't supposed to be happy. He was supposed to help everyone. And he'd failed two people already. So he decided, right then and there, he wouldn't fail anymore. He picked up his heart and locked it away in a safe, safely and tightly. Kubo… Kubo could have it for all he cared. He could have that way with him of making his heart flutter with a single look. He could have that way with him of making him ache for his kiss. He could have that way with him of making him so nervous and happy every time he saw him, every time he heard his voice. But he would never dream of telling Kubo how he felt. He would never bring the man home, and introduce him as his everything. He would never hold his hand in his. He would help him. That's all he was for. And if Lucian wanted more, then goddammit, you foolish ignoramus. Man up and stop having needs of your own already! So he had to do what was most important now. He couldn't think about how he felt. He had to stop someone from dying again. No one had to die ever again. He had to fix everything. He knew everyone had their reasons. Maybe Miyako's just weren't clear to him. She seemed messed up, she really did. But… he had to make sure she was okay. …he had a selfish wish in his mind, one that seemed a little wild. He had almost wanted to ask her, if she could speak to Kaoru. If she could speak to his family for him. Say all those things he could never say. But she was hurting. And he wanted to help. Setsuna was hurting, Kubo was hurting, Mei was hurting, Sawyer was hurting, Shi was hurting, Idris was hurting, Sutaraitsu was hurting, Darcy was hurting, Akari was hurting, and everyone else… everyone was hurting. And as the Ultimate Therapist… he had to help everyone through this. He headed over to Miyako, and looked at her worriedly. "...hey, are you okay? Do you need to talk?" He knew what he expected. He expected for her to reject the offer. But he wanted to offer it to everyone. It seemed they all needed it more than ever now. I need to save them… but who is going to save me? Darcy Harper's POV"Sawyer?... I just wanted to ask. Are you okay? I saw what you saw, the pair of tombstones." He bit his lip. "What was that about?" Sawyer blinked, perplexed. "Bread Twins? What Bread Twins?" Oh. They were blocking everything out again, and making completely irrelevant references. Of course. Darcy sighed. "Look, Sawyer, I…" His hands tightened their shaky grip on his friend's shoulders. "I love your optimism, I really appreciate it. It's… a fantastic quality you have. To always see things as better than they actually are. But… I have so much to learn about you. So much I never got to know. What happened to you after I moved away?..." Sawyer stared blankly, making a faint buzzing sound from their mouth. Then, they responded. "EHHHH, it's not important! Wanna go flip tables together?" they exclaimed. …this was hopeless. They always had had a way of blocking things out. But never to this degree. Sawyer… what happened to you? Just what had gone so wrong? …It's my fault, isn't it? They needed me. But I wasn't there. Because… because Mom… Darcy grimaced. Why did Dad have to go? Why did Dad have to leave? Darcy had never known him very well. But then, it didn't seem like all that long until he drove away, forever, never to be seen again. Mom was never the same. She would shout at you, and order you around, and there were the times she acted so distant, and the times when she was extra drunk. The times that she would beat you and chase you around until you pleaded with her to stop, and even then she might not. You learned to swallow the poison without complaining, so it wouldn't get any worse. You would go above and beyond to do more than what was asked of you. Not a speck of dust left behind in the house. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, desserts, you made them all. You learned to get As in every subject. You didn't sleep a wink until every little bit of work was done. You'd say no when people asked you to go to parties. You'd say your prayers, and you'd read your Bible. You'd attend at church. You'd give to the homeless, you'd preach, preach, preach. Work, work, housework, homework, volunteer work. You did it all. You did everything. And then you'd look at your friend with the carefree smile, who never seemed to have a trouble in the world. Who seemed to have it all so easy. An only child, and always the favorite of their family. Always so well-loved and deeply cared for. Always told yes by their parents, and never told of anything that'd harm them. Loved. Supported. Accepted. Seen. All those things Darcy never got to have. Mom always loved Erica better. It was like Darcy didn't even exist, unless he did something wrong. And then, he was shouted at and beaten. Sometimes he wound up with cuts all over his body from the broken wine bottles. And here was Sawyer, faced with a worse trouble than Darcy could have possibly imagined. A worse secret than Darcy could have possibly imagined. Two tombstones. Just what could it have possibly been?... "Sawyer, please. You're my best friend." Darcy shuddered as he said the words. He… He wanted it to be more than that. Not just… I'll go to prom with you, my dear friend, since Will refused to go with you. Not just… best friends. "I want to help you… you mean the world to me. So… please." He gripped Sawyer's hands, and looked right at them desperately. "What happened after I moved away?" Sawyer Laurens's POVWhy would anyone want to remember the past? It wasn't important. But… he was their friend. So… Sawyer sighed. "Oh, you know. I had other friends, so I wasn't really lonely, don't worry! But… I kinda missed you though, Dace. It wasn't the same without you. It felt kinda lonely sometimes, y'know? It's always felt like you're the one who really gets me!" Darcy nodded, with an urgent expression on his face, urging Sawyer to go on. "And?" "Well, y'know… I just sorta existed, did the normal things! I could never understand why your family and you up and left like that!" Darcy froze. He seemed to be remembering something unpleasant. "Well… it… may have had to do with… what happened with Erica." Sawyer raised their eyebrows. "Ohhh. You mean… yeah. I could never understand why she did that either, Dace. She was a great lady! I really didn't think she'd do something like that." Darcy bit his lip and looked away. "Yeah… me neither. But the big thing was, Sawyer… Mom thought you were a bad influence." Sawyer gasped. "She wanted to take you away from me? NO! WHYYYY?" Darcy sighed, crossing his arms. "Because I always got worse grades when I spent time with you. And sometimes, we'd get up to trouble, and she'd…" He shuddered. "You know… typical parent stuff. But… what happened?" "Oh, nothing really. I got scouted, and eventually I wound up here! Nothing that big happened." Nothing. Nothing at all. Nothing bad happened at all. Darcy gave Sawyer a wobbly smile. "...alright then. Let's go flip some tables." Sawyer gasped. "YAYYYY!" They excitedly hugged Darcy. (Darcy's face reddened in response.) "OW! WHY DOES MY ARM HURT?!" Darcy would have facepalmed, had his arms not been trapped. "Y-You need to be more careful than that! You can't just overexert your arms, Sawyer." Sawyer looked perplexed. "Oh! Right. Realistic dream physics. Heheh." Darcy winced in response. "Alright. Let's go flip some tables!" They left the dorm together. Sawyer began droning out the entirety of Five Nights at Freddy's lore to Darcy, while he privately rolled his eyes and wondered how the heck Sawyer memorized all this stuff, but listened anyway, as they both headed to the cafeteria to flip tables together. Sawyer beamed. Everything was great. What a fun, fun little game! But why did Darcy seem to act… like everything wasn't great? Blood splattered on the ground. Crying, screaming. Must have been a spilled ice-cream cone! The child was crying, and the people on the roller-coasters were screaming. And then his mother came along and bought him a new ice-cream cone. And the little boy smiled, and all was right in the world. No life-altering tragedies. It was all a fun little game, where nothing ever went wrong. [Read more] |