Log In
Interaction Multiplier IconFlying Weather Castform Don't have an account yet? Register now!
.

Forum Thread

The Writing Clan (Corner)

Forum-Index Fan Clubs Inactive Clubs The Writing Clan (Corner)
Nessy
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 79

Forum Posts: 1,966
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 09:27 (8 Years ago)
The Writing Corner

Oh, hello! I didn't see you there! I'm Nessy, and this is the writing corner!
I see you like to write, otherwise, why would you be here? Pen in your hand, fingers on the keyboard, and an ink smudge on your cheek....no, the other one, silly goose! Yes, you are a writer all right.

I'd like to introduce you to everyone, but first, take a seat. This is a place where you can share your stories, ask for critique, and more! Every week, there will be a prompt or two from the other members, which you can write from! And....you are allowed to ask for any writing help you need! That's right!

There is a beautiful selection of writing styles, and I can't wait to see them all!


Rules!
Show hidden content

~Post all writings in a spoiler tag so that scrolling doesn't take 15 hours.
~Be polite to your peers
~When someone asks for critique, it is OKAY to have a negative opinion, as long as you aren't trying to hurt the other person.
~If someone has a negative opinion of your writing, be mature about it. Think about how you can improve, not about how you can whine.
~In the “oth er” section of your form, put your trainer ID# from your trainercard – edit out when you are added
~No mini-modding, the mod(s) will take care of it.
~Absolutely NO posts of less than 6 words, we are writers! This also will prevent spam and suchlike.



Okay, so you read the rules? Right? Because the writer's corner is a club, we want to make sure all members know the rules and follow them diligently. I know it's a pain, but the rules will help prevent...certain misunderstandings.

Members:

Show hidden content

You look around the club. All around you are familiar faces, worn out places, and squishy armchairs that smell mysteriously of chai tea.

These are your fellow writers.


Nessy – Club Leader – wants critique
Giltine13 - Mod - Reading

Ufimtsev - Member - Giving Critique and Reading
Kyourine - Member - Reading and Writing
TurnTechTimaeus - Member - wants critique and help with writing
~Gummy~ - Member - Wants help editing

Dakar -Member - Wants Ideas and Critique
EeveeSong360- Critique on what to improve, Inspiration, and Reading
enderknux - Member - Wants help with writing and prompts
ChicaTheChicken - Member - Wants Ideas and Inspiration

Viper - Member - wants Critique, prompts, and reading material
Eeveelution8 - Member - wants Reading material, critique and prompts
Xipe_Totec - Member - wants critique mostly
GinaNeko - Member - wants Inspiration and critique

KASUMEME - member - a place to put their work, also critique
DragonSoul - member - Critique, good small entries, and friends!
Neverlight - member - Critique, Ideas, Things of that nature
ZephyrTenjoin - member - Someplace to improve my work, people to help me improve, and a general fun time.

Xamdsoul - member - to goof around with writing and get better at the same time.
GOOM_LORD - member - critique and ideas
Seraph - member - Other poetry lovers
viki123 - member - Help for writer's block, critique and ideas.


And of course! Paperwork! We all hate LOVE paperwork! Just fill out these lovely forms so I can add you to the club's member base!

Membership form:

[b]Hey, I'm a writer![/b]
[i]Username[/i]:
[i]What I am looking for here[/i]:
[I]A sample of my Writing[/i]: (put in a link or a spoiler)
[i]Other[/i]:


And an example form just for you!
Show hidden content

Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: Nessy
What I am looking for here: Critique mostly
A sample of my Writing: A myth I wrote this past year, still under work. Tide is a goddess I am adding to the Norse pantheon.
Other: :D



Every so often, there will be a few prompts to get your creative juices flowing! These will range from a picture to a story to a poem.

The Current Prompts:
Show hidden content

-Take your least used character or OC and give them a backstory that builds their personality more. Doesn't have to be big or world changing, I actually advise against that. Help/Advice article

-Poem - focus on a place you visited when you were seven. Whether it was school, or a road trip, or the kitchen.

-story with a setting: here


And that should be all for now dearies! If you want to make a banner, or if you think I should add anything, feel free to PM or Palpad me!

Oh yes, and if you feel up to the task of being a Co-leader or a moderator of this thread, you should also feel free to send me a message!

Challenges!

Challenge 1

Ta ta for now dearies!



If you can read this, you know how to read.

Trick and Treat art by Podunk
Ufimtsev
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 40

Forum Posts: 416
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 10:52 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: Ufimtsev
What I am looking for here: A cute little corner where I get to see who else writes. Maybe stumble upon some fellow Wrimos or stray Frenzy-goers. Giving critiques, possibly, but mostly an excuse to read other peoples' works. ouo
A sample of my Writing:
Show hidden content
Um. For now it'll be something extremely small, pulled out of an in-progress piece... since most of it's unedited. And I'm not at a desktop, thus ease is not on my side.

The North Star shone so unremarkably in its place far above him. Danny could clearly see the constellations and asterisms that riddled the deep, dark fabric of space — within sight was Orion's Belt, three twinkling stitches in the very midst of four.

Ursa Major caught his eye; gracefully stretched to cover a magnificent portion of the heavens as well — shining, glimmering over his head. The celestial objects emanated a sort of higher glory from where they rested, there — in the vast, otherwise empty, expanse.

They cried with him. They cried endless tears of shooting stars, pulsing and streaking across the sky and beyond the earth, glimpses of white piercing the veil. Echoing sorrow in his pained, strained core.

Dipper Pines was somewhere up there, Danny was sure. Somewhere, watching his mourning twin sister from a throne of bright starlight.


aka: in which the Gravity Falls fandom deeply regrets inviting me to the party

Other: Thank you for creating this beautiful corner! (and when people run in circles it's a very very mad world, don'tcha know)




TurnTechTimaeus
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 20

Forum Posts: 58
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 13:36 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: TurnTechTimaeus
What I am looking for here: Critique and help with not info dumping all over the place
A sample of my Writing:
Show hidden content
The first paragraph from a story I'm currently writing:

The rain thundered down, coating the woman's seal skin coat. It was too muggy, too rainy in the south, she decided. The gates of the city came into view and the woman spurred her horse on.
"Who goes there?" A guard on the wall yelled, they had another trainee at the gate, she noted bitterly.
"I wish to speak to Lady Caterina. My name is Karsi Göransson." The woman stated.
"You sound awful like a woman for someone whose last name is Göransson."
"My father wanted a son, better to give his daughter a surname than to let his name die." Karsi muttered bitterly. The gate opened slowly and Karsi dismounted and allowed her horse free.


Other:#62189731

I write far too much medieval fiction and when I type (I write on paper) I add details in, so what's written above has some edits, that I'm going to write into my actual work I think. :/ Thanks for creating this corner ^-^
At the bottom of the ocean
When there is nothing left to take away
When there is nothing more to add
When there is nothing but decay
Carry me away
Like driftwood to the sea - Carry Me Away, Annisokay

I Forgot To Remember To Forget.
ymsf_me
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 19

Forum Posts: 74
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 13:48 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: kyourine
What I am looking for here: I just want an excuse to be able to write stories.. and I'd also love to see the works of other people ^^
A sample of my Writing:
This was originally a story for our character design project in Arts and Drafting class last year.. I have this part on my desktop but I'm still trying to find the other parts..
Show hidden content

The universe, before it was created, was nothing but a garden of magical energy, all in the form of floating spheres--Archiri, as humans would soon call them--- in different sizes and colors. The six gods of Pandora worked their magic into this once insignificant field and created the heavenly bodies. Stars, planets, meteors. They shone as bright as the gods could make them.

This creation was merely intended to be a toy for their entertainment. Until they came across an unusual Archiros--one which burned brighter than the others. Its outshined all of the others as the light it radiated pierced through even the darkest obsidians of space.

The gods acknowledged the exceptional potential this certain Archiros held, and so their intentions changed. They graced it with the gift of six elements---Water, Earth, Fire, Air, Light, Darkness---and it became the sanctuary of life. The balance between these elements were contained. Its body was adorned with lush vegetation, free-running waters, flames, life-sustaining oxygen, and the sun-kissed sky at day lingered for as long as the star-sprinkled night sky did.


Other:
478758045
I don't speak English in real life unless it's for educational purposes, so please pardon any grammatical errors >< I also space out a lot, so I'm not good at speed writing
Nessy
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 79

Forum Posts: 1,966
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 17:38 (8 Years ago)
I've added all three of you!

AND OMG I'm so excited to read more! READ ALL THE STUFF!!!

If you can read this, you know how to read.

Trick and Treat art by Podunk
Gummy
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 17

Forum Posts: 198
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 17:54 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: ~Gummy~
What I am looking for here: Trying to create a series of books right now, looking for people who can edit my writing and enjoy it in general :b.
A sample of my Writing:
Show hidden content

A part of my story I'm gonna write.

Willow walked down the halls of the 'mansion' she had been saved in. After the car crash from 2 years ago, she had been getting used to the fancy place. Magic was everywhere, Willow had learned that on her first weeks here. Her best friend, Myrda, arrived a couple days after she did. Passing a glass-framed picture, she looked at herself in it.

Willow's long, light brown hair, was put up in a braid, on her right shoulder. Her green eyes seemed to change from one shade to another. For a second she thought she was seeing things. Then she saw it again. Her eyes changed color. Was it just the picture, that maybe had magic in it? Or were her eyes changing color? She needed to find out. Soon.

Willow quickly ran to another glass-framed picture. Her eyes were changing colors. She looked at her hand in the mirror, to make sure that her hands weren't changing in the mirror, they werent changing in real life. Her hands weren't doing anything in the picture, which she used as a mirror. Then, Willow held them up to a plant on the wall, and all of a sudden, the stems of the plant enlarged. Her hands were glowing a blue-green color. I need to figure out what's happening, fast, she thought to herself.

Other:#638157463

I like to write magic and stuff like that.

If it would make you happy,
I'll give my most precious thing to you.


Even if it turns out we can't meet for a second time,
A smile will always bloom in my heart.
Goodbye..


-Vana n' Ice, The Last Supper.


Nessy
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 79

Forum Posts: 1,966
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 18:05 (8 Years ago)
Added!

And later today I'm gonna be posting some more of my writing, since yayay!

If you can read this, you know how to read.

Trick and Treat art by Podunk
TurnTechTimaeus
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 20

Forum Posts: 58
Posted: Wed, 17/06/2015 18:19 (8 Years ago)
Yay! I'm going to work on my story I think, I'm doing a rewrite now so I'm happy with the first paragraph
At the bottom of the ocean
When there is nothing left to take away
When there is nothing more to add
When there is nothing but decay
Carry me away
Like driftwood to the sea - Carry Me Away, Annisokay

I Forgot To Remember To Forget.
Pleiadesu
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 37

Forum Posts: 1,241
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 06:49 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: Dakar
What I am looking for here: Mostly ideas and critique.
A sample of my Writing:
Show hidden content
This is a short poem I wrote a long time ago, and I'm hoping to get back to poetry soon.
(I also prefer to write rhymes, but sometimes I got off track.)

Life is nothing but a collection of lies.
Nothing more than some lows and highs.
When you give it up, you release all ties.
But when you think about it, it seems very nice.
Tricking you is the way of life, just a gigantic heist.

I also write short stories and stuff, but I've got no examples to show right now.

Other: #299126539
Rage || More rage || Ultimate rage
"Don't let someone else make you feel guilty or ashamed about something you don't have control over, whether it is your skin color, your sexual preference or otherwise."
- Alex Bolton (I Hate Everything)
Giltine13
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 68

Forum Posts: 464
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 09:36 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
(Not really..well, yet)
Username: Geisha13
What I am looking for here: to read other peoples wonderful works and help other grow into beautiful butterflies~ I might give it a try at my own works when I'm done with being a coward..
A sample of my Writing: I'm afraid I still havent wrote anything down, its all still in my head, so I will understand if Im rejected.. But I have read a lot, so maybe I still could be of any help to others!!
Other:
enderknux
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 39

Forum Posts: 1,818
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 18:52 (8 Years ago)
Hey, I'm a writer!
Username: enderknux (call me Knux, if you'd like)
What I am looking for here: Help with writing, and helpful ideas (prompts)
A sample of my Writing:
Show hidden content

The Hidden Bluff

It was a crisp Autumn day, the wind was blowing the yellow, brown, and red leaves about. Jhunia looked out of the window of the gloomy castle, hidden away from view by a cold lurking fog. She appeared to be lost in thought, and maybe in time too. Her cold stare motionless like it was frozen on her face, her posture perfect. Her purple eye shadow making her eyes all the darker. Finally she got up and walked on towards the next room leaving the gloomy window behind her. As she entered that room everything looked as dark as the room before, however a silver sparkling mirror caught her eye. “Nhypa!” Jhunia suddenly spoke loudly and hastily. Before long, a silver mist showed up in the mirror, and a dark figure began to form in this mist,
”Oh-- oh, um- yes, Miss Jhunia?” The figure said fully forming and taking the shape of a shinning light blue girl with long deep silver hair and small graceful wings. Jhunia turned, her long jet black dress swept along the floor as she did so, and a tall staff with a emerald in the base appeared out of thin air, and just floating there. “Nhypa dear, I must run and er- get something… special,” Jhunia said smiling wickedly,”And I need you to keep watch over my castle? Got it dear?” she added. Nhypa made a gulping sound then replied in a quiet voice,”Got it miss,” while nodding her head. “Good… I’ll be back soon, and make sure no ones gets in… and if they do make sure to don’t get it,” she added her eyes drifting to the door that lead back to the room before. “Yes miss Jhunia,” Nhypa nodded again then faded away as fast as she had appeared. Jhunia sighed, and in a heartbeat grabbed her staff and walked quickly out of the room, her dress whipping quickly behind her.
“Try to keep up!” Kayal said laughing as her friend Rosy chased after her. Kayal’s friend was all normal unlike Kayal, who was accidentally mutated in a lab on a school field trip. She had a long light green and blue spotted tail, with a sea green puff at the end. Kayal had a snout instead of a mouth, and her skin was pale green, but not the ugly green the light and beautiful one. She had a light purple forked tongue, like a snakes, and green paws with blue pads, instead of hands, long braided light blue hair, and light green cat-like ears. However the rest of her was all human, other than the fact she was faster than most. Rosy was normal with bright red hair, a daisy flower crown, jeans, dark red lip gloss, a dark black spiked wristband, and a pink T-shirt with a crown on it and had the text “Royal Rebel” printed on it. Rosy was also the only one who didn’t mind Kayal’s differences. “Oof!” Kayal puffed running into something. “What is it?” Rosy called from a distance. “I’m not sure… it seems to be an invisible wall or something…?” Kayal called pressing on the thing that blocked her in mid-air. “Odd… You see my old friends, you know those now jerk-wanna-be, used to say that behind a hidden wall is an old castle belonging to an evil sorceress, but those are just old fairy tales,” Rosy called catching up and too putting her hands on the “wall”. “Try feeling around?” Kayal murmured hoping to hit a hidden switch. After feeling around for a few minute the two gave up and started walking towards a nearby willow tree. Kayal sat down first, then Rosy. “So… do you think the stories are true?” Rosy asked her friend. “I dunno maybe…” Kayal replied, resting her arm on a low hanging branch, which broke right away. “WHA-?” The two screamed as the tree flipped inside out and turned out to be quite hollow. “COOL!” Kayal said. “Neato!” Rosy exclaimed. The two stepped inside the hollow tree and immediately flipped again, but this time they were turned out behind the hidden wall.
“Woah…” the two echoed at once. “So it… it is true…” Kayal echoed. “Should we risk it and explore or turn back now?” Rosy said turning around to admire the castle, but when she turned back Kayal was darting to the castle already. “WAIT!” Rosy called as Kayal skidded to a halt,” This place must have some pretty sick security, If we are going to get in, we stick together, and don’t run ahead. No woman left behind, deal?” Rosy said in a teacher-like tone. “Fine,” Kayal grumbled in return, as the two walked together to the doors, keeping the same pace. As soon as they reached the doors they saw a big snake head knocker. “Should we knock…?” Kayal asked and got a quick and breathless “No.” from Rosy. “Then how do you reckon we get in?” Kayal asked, then Rosy looked around and noticed a small window, and gestured to Kayal to follow. The two creeped along the castle until they got to the window and they climbed in. “Qw shouldn’t be here, I have a bad feeling about this...” Kayal said quietly as they enter the room.
As the two crept along the inside of the castle Kayal heard a faint sing-song voice singing a lovely tune. “Where do you think that’s coming from?” Kayal asked. “What?” Rosy asked urgently. “That music,” Kayal said,” can’t you hear it?”. “N- No.. It might be that your ears are so much better than mine… Lead the way to the music and I’ll follow,” Rosy said seeing the look on Kayal’s face as she touched her ears with her paws,” O- Ok,”. The two kept going towards the music until they stopped dead at a door. “I hear it now too, what a lovely voice, whatever’s singing that can’t hurt us, it sounds to kind,” Rosy said seeing Kayal’s look of doubt she added,” I’ll go in first,” and without looking back Rosy opened the door so quietly, not even Kayal’s great ears heard it. The two crept into the room, their jaws (and snouts) drooping when they what was making the lovely noise.
On the wall was a great silver misty mirror, with a beautiful light blue girl with silver hair, and small clear wings inside it, singing. Her eyes were closed, as she sung, so she didn’t notice the two at first. Rosy gaped in awe longer than Kayal, because Kayal was used to differences, considering herself. Finally the misty figure opened it’s deep hazel eyes. “Ah! Intruders! I must signal the guards!” She said urgently, looking at Rosy, and not noticing Kayal at first. “Please, wait!” Kayal said quietly. When the blue girl turned to see Kayal she almost stopped panicking, she stared at Kayal for a few heartbeats then stopped. “You seem… Different, than the others…” She said blinking. “Yes…” Kayal said with almost no emotion in her voice. “I am Nhypa, and you are…?” She said not taking her eye’s off of Kayal. “Kayal…” Kayal said firmly.
“Oh dear Kayal you must save me… and before Jhudia comes back! No mortals can save me from my imprisonment… hear my pleads great Kayal,” Nhypa pleaded. “O-Oh… I’m nothing special, and I have no idea what you are taking about…” Kayal said very confused. Rosy stood there as if frozen, she wanted to talk, but knew if she came in Nhypa would remember her and send the guards. “Oh-Oh-oh but you are Special, Kayal, only you or Jhunia, could free me, and we all know Jhunia would never let me go…” Nhypa said. “But- I don’t even know who Jhunia is…” Kayal explained. “oh-oh… But you must help, Jhunia will be back any moment now. Please!” Nhypa cried again. clunk. clunk. clunk. Rosy’s stomach lurched as Nhypa cried hurriedly,“Kayal, oh- you must leave! Jhunia’s back!”. “But- what about you, I have know idea who you or Jhunia are, or how to free you, but I can’t just leave you!” Kayal said quickly as Rosy pulled her into the shadow’s and out of sight. “No time! Leave now!” Nhypa said as the door creaked open. Nhypa vanished quickly as a tall woman wearing all black, purple, and green and a long wooden staff, with an emerald in it, walked in, her dress swishing after her.
“Dear Nhypa, I’m home,” She spoke in a cold voice. The blue girl appeared again,”O- oh- Hello again miss Jhunia!” Nhypa said as if everything that just happened hadn’t. “I’ve got my special item, do you still have my other special item?” Jhunia asked Nhypa in her stone cold voice. “Ye- yes miss, wha- what exactly are you planning to do with both these i-items?” Nhypa asked as a beautiful Amethyst necklace floated in front of Jhunia. “Why, dear Nhypa, Make a necklace of such power I can control anyone who comes close enough to me,” Jhunia said with a deep wicked chuckle and smirk. “Oh- miss Jhunia… may I get one last look at that beautiful necklace before your er- corrupt it?” Nhypa asked in such a casual tone, even Kayal didn’t know something was up. “Why of course dear Nhypa,” Jhunia said, and as soon as the words were out of her mouth the necklace was chained around Kayal’s neck, and it was glowing so Jhunia could see Kayal.
“YOU FOOL!” Jhunia cried as Kayal’s eyes glowed green and she started floating with a green aura around her. “I’m not a fool, Miss Jhunia, I’m freeing myself, and the rest of the world from your wicked plans!” Nhypa said as Kayal lost all control of herself and shot a huge ray of green fire at Jhunia. Then everything when black for a few heartbeats and when everything came back, Kayal was back in control, and Nhypa stood where Jhunia was. Jhunia however was now trapped in the mirror.
“You fools! you’ll pay for this!” Jhunia cried in her cold voice. “Oh but dear Jhudia You must keep watch over my tower,” Nhypa taunted. “thank you again for freeing me,” Nhypa said turning to Kayal, and I can restore my castle back to it’s old beauty. You see Jhunia came and stole castle and with that necklace trapped me into the mirror,” Nhypa said, pointed to the necklace still on Kayal. “Unfortunately… it’s stuck on you now.. for it develops a bond with its user, and can't come off, I’m sorry for everything I’ve put you through, please accept this as my apology,” Nhypa said reaching into the bag the Jhunia had and pulling out a jet black stone,” It will let you transport home. Feel free to visit again, now that you know the secret tunnel in. Goodbye fair heroes,” Nhypa said, as the quite confused Rosy, and the quite thrilled Kayal touched the stone and transported home.

Other: #475041128

Also...
I'm so glad you made this! I love writing.
Also please note, I might make typos, I'm not prefect. Also you may think some names are spelled wrong, trust me, I meant for them to be like that.

Nessy
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 79

Forum Posts: 1,966
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 19:06 (8 Years ago)
All added, even Geisha because im sure we can pull you out of your shell at some point

I keep getting distracted with books....speaking of, gonna go read more, write later - post later as well.

I'm so happy with the turnout here, y'all be making me happy!

If you can read this, you know how to read.

Trick and Treat art by Podunk
TurnTechTimaeus
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 20

Forum Posts: 58
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 19:28 (8 Years ago)
The turnout is awesome! I should probably carry on writing now or at the very least world building.
At the bottom of the ocean
When there is nothing left to take away
When there is nothing more to add
When there is nothing but decay
Carry me away
Like driftwood to the sea - Carry Me Away, Annisokay

I Forgot To Remember To Forget.
enderknux
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 39

Forum Posts: 1,818
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 19:32 (8 Years ago)
I'm happy to be accepted.
I'm actually working on a little something at the moment, for fun. Hoping to carry it on, any ideas or feedback?

First paragraph is all I got though X3

Show hidden content

Those Deep Green Eyes

Camilla wandered through the deep jungle on her island home. Her only real friends were the native animals, her pet toucan Magell, and her own mind. Camilla and her family had shipwrecked on this island when she was only 4. She was the only person on board who had survived, the wild animals had taken her in. Camilla, only being 12 now, had no fear, for even the tough jaguars and the poisonous snakes had never bothered her. Camilla had the deepest emerald green eyes, she wore a dress that she made out of the finest vines and leaves, and a flower crown of the best violet flowers on the island. Magell, her pet toucan, normal perched on her shoulder or arm, or flew beside her. Camilla didn’t know what she was, and didn’t know much English.


TurnTechTimaeus
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 20

Forum Posts: 58
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 19:56 (8 Years ago)
That's really good! You could have her come into contact with people see where it goes from there?
At the bottom of the ocean
When there is nothing left to take away
When there is nothing more to add
When there is nothing but decay
Carry me away
Like driftwood to the sea - Carry Me Away, Annisokay

I Forgot To Remember To Forget.
enderknux
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 39

Forum Posts: 1,818
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 20:05 (8 Years ago)
Thanks, I was thinking it'd be a prince/rich dude. What do you think about that idea? Or maybe A pirate invasion, and they kidnap her or something? So many ideas X3

Gummy
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 17

Forum Posts: 198
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 20:07 (8 Years ago)
The second option sounds more interesting. Go for that one, i say.

If it would make you happy,
I'll give my most precious thing to you.


Even if it turns out we can't meet for a second time,
A smile will always bloom in my heart.
Goodbye..


-Vana n' Ice, The Last Supper.


Ufimtsev
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 40

Forum Posts: 416
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 20:39 (8 Years ago)
Actually, I'd suggest using both, if you want. Tie it in together somehow - make the prince a part of the pirate-kidnapping plot or something. New stories have a ton of potential; maybe confusing, always awesome. :'3

I'm not writing a ton these days (I'm still a bit burned out from last NaNo), but I'm gonna try to get back in the game this week. aka, finishing some prompts! Thanks guys, just the thought of this clan makes me wanna write. ;w;

Uhhh, lesse... if you need any specific help writing (for example, grammar? or spelling? or continuity, descriptions, pacing, etc.?) I can probably help out at least a lil tiny bit.



enderknux
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 39

Forum Posts: 1,818
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 20:48 (8 Years ago)
Wow you are right, the tie them together idea, that would be cool. Maybe the prince was kidnapped too and they escape together, or the prince saves her from the pirates, or The prince is actually the captain. So many ideas again X3

Ufimtsev
OFFLINE
Trainerlevel: 40

Forum Posts: 416
Posted: Thu, 18/06/2015 21:22 (8 Years ago)
I'm so sorry I just started typing, and look what happened. I do this too often.
It's a tiny plot from me, but maybe it'll give you ideas! ...even though you have tons and tons as it is, oh no. :'D

... um, sometimes - when a story is just starting out - I may or may not spout facts and exclamation marks endlessly. It's not supposed to be taken seriously. In fact, just laugh. That'll make everything better.

*laughs*

Show hidden content

How about: the dude she runs into is a servant aboard the ship, but is also the heir to the warring Ninja faction's throne, and a Ninja spy! He tricks the scallywags into thinking Camilla is important - "she's the key to obtaining a legendary hoard of treasure!" Naturally, they figure they might as well try it and kidnap her (Magell sneaks along for the ride).

Days pass! The secret prince feels guilty for using Camilla like this (even though the pirates are mildly polite and take good care of her).

They arrive at the fabled cavern on an island, whose mountains of gold is hidden away behind a door. This barrier can only be opened by true royalty, or so the legend goes. (insert fairy tale about the treasure belonging to a rich dead dude here.) It's never been tested, since everyone knows pirates aren't close on the family tree to kings and queens, and actual rulers are too well guarded to be taken.

(The pirates wonder why it was so easy to kidnap Camilla. They don't wonder for long; it hurts to be deep in thought.)

Because pirates need their sleep, they take the night off and decide to try in the morning. The nameless prince sneaks off.

Camilla watches him go, confused at the servant's actions. They were almost friends at this point. She follows him! She lurks as he tries to open the door and fails! He heads back to the camp, frustrated at himself.

(He was sure, being an actual prince and all, that he'd be able to get to the treasure.)

She stays and heads for the door herself!

Her hand reaches for it....

...suspense....

...intense descriptions of the surrounding areas...

...waiting for the perfect moment to reveal that

SHE can get in! Somehow, she's royalty!

Because the wild animals that raised her consider her their princess, and her bond with them is stronger than the prince's ties with his family (he's actually not doing this for them, but planning to take the gold for himself).

...

After that, I don't know. This plot kind of just... happened. XD

I wonder what she'd do with the gold? Give it to the pirates anyways? Build a sanctuary back at home? Start a wildlife charity foundation??

Ninja make everything more awesome!